Page 66 of A Touch of Heaven

My tear lands on his cheek. “I love you too,” I whisper, “so you have to stay with me, okay?”

Chase falls to his feet beside me, “Nate, I’m so sorry, I’m so fucking sorry.”

Nate smiles up as Chase grabs his brother's hand. “It’s okay. She’s okay. Look after her, you do that, and it’s okay.”

Chase nods. “Of course, but you can look after her too; you just need to hold on. The ambulance is coming, brother. You have to fucking fight this. You’re going to be fine. I’m going to celebrate with you when you get drafted, and I’m going to be in the stands when you play your first game. I’m sorry. I promise I’ll be a better brother. You…you…you need to just hold on, okay? Hold on baby brother please.”

Nate chuckles, his breathing ragged. “You know that’s not going to happen. I’m dying; I can feel it. Just love her, that’s all I want.”

His eyes turn back to me. “Baby, all I ever wanted was you, but I know now it wasn’t…wasn’t…”

He spits blood out of his mouth, and it runs down his chin. I try to desperately wipe it away. I can hear him gagging on it as it fills his lungs. His hand drops from my face with a sudden thud to the ground, so deafening I will never forget it.

That will be the last sound I ever hear from him. Not his laugh, not my name on his lips, not him poking fun at me or trying to make me feel better. Just a loud, dull thud of his hand as it lands in the sand around us.

I can hear the sirens in the background. Help is coming, but it’s too late. You’re meant to hear those and feel hope, but my hope just died along with the only one who loved me so purely and without fault.

I’m done being the innocent princess. I’m done being that naïve little girl. I can feel the cold seep in, take root deep inside of me, making me its new home. Like the blood seeping into my jeans, this cold seeps into my soul, my very being, every little crack. I softly slip my hands from around him, leaving him on the ground.

I don’t get up. I don’t think my feet would hold me if I tried. Instead, I embrace the cold and darkness and pray it makes me numb for what I need to do. I feel arms pull me up off the ground, locking me in their embrace as they pull me to their chest to look away. Chase expects me to break down, to sob, but the tears stop coming. There’s nothing left inside of me. I just look at Nate on the ground. He’s gone. That’s just a shell lying there.

EPILOGUE

BROOKE

Ipace in the hospital for hours until I finally give up and take a seat. The last few hours are a complete blur. Nate’s been in surgery for what seems like forever, and no one will tell me anything. Jax sits by me, handing me a coffee. I take it, but I just sit with it. My eyes stay on the floor. “Brooke. I think you need to get checked out.”

“I’m fine,” I say monotonously. I can’t offer anything more.

“Brooke, you’re not fine. You had a gun held to your head, and you are covered in your best friend’s blood.”

“I’m fine, Jax. I’m not moving until I know he’s okay.”

He sighs, “Let me see if I can find out anything again.” He gets up, and I feel his hand on my shoulder, briefly trying to reassure me. It doesn’t feel real. None of this does. A few hours ago, I was laughing with my friends, kissing my boyfriend, and now…

“Baby, he’s right…I think you’re in shock.” Chase whispers, his hand on my arm squeezing, but I shrug him off, not wanting to feel him touch me.

I see the doctor from earlier, and he walks over to us. I stand up shakily, looking at him, bracing myself. “Which one of you is family?”

Harper talks for us, “We all are.” She takes my hand and gives it a squeeze, and I offer her a weak smile because it’s all I can manage. “Is he…”

The doctor holds his hand up to stop her. “He’s out of surgery, but he has a long road to go. The bullet punctured his lung and it caused a lot of internal damage. We removed the bullet and did what we could, but it’s up to him now. There’s nothing more we can do for him. If he wants to wake up, he will, and if not…” He stops, trailing off like he doesn’t want to finish the end of that sentence.

“Thank you, Doctor,” I hear Chase say. It’s like everyone is speaking through a bubble right now. Everything is muted, and I can’t feel anything but the cold.

“You can go and see him if you want, but not all of you at once.”

Chase takes my hand, threading his long fingers through mine. “Do you want to go first with me?” I nod slowly, I’m on autopilot, but I pull my fingers from his. He gives me a curious look but doesn’t push.

We walk up the corridor to intensive care, where his room is, pausing to stand outside for a minute. Chase pulls me into his arms, “Brooke, you can’t blame yourself for this. He wasn’t shot because of you. It’s not your fault.” I look up at him, taking a step back.

“I don’t. It’s your fault. You and Asher and Jax. You’re all to blame. You did this to him. You told me it was going to be okay, Chase. You told me you were careful. That there was no evidence you did anything. No witnesses, nothing. But that man knew. He must have found something that led him to us. You did this.” A burning fire fills my veins, and I stare at him dead on, pulling my arms out of his grasp as he reaches for me again.

“Brooke, I…”

I cut him off, “No, Chase, I don’t want to hear anything else. We were a mistake. It never should have happened, and if Nate dies”—I barely manage to choke that word out—“I will never forgive you.”

I’m interrupted by a loud, rapid beeping, and a group of doctors and nurses run past us and into his room. We know what that means. His body is failing, and we’re going to lose him.

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