Page 28 of Love Me In Color

I took my millionth deep breath of the last ten minutes. “I want to extend a warm welcome to our colleagues from the California office who have gracefully committed to camping out here for the next twelve weeks. Sorry we stole you from your families for a bit, but thank you so much for being here. We are pleased to welcome you to New Windsor, and I know we’re all going to have a great time working together.”

“Thank you, Blake,” Erik’s booming voice echoed through the room, accepting my welcome from his seat.

In a different life, his voice was the voice of comfort. A voice that made everything okay and helped me through some of the hardest times growing up. Today, it made me feel nothing but nervous. “On behalf of the California team, we are incredibly excited about the opportunity to work closely with your team on this.”

“Thank you, Erik.”

His name caught in my throat. I turned to Nathaniel. He gave me a reassuring look and a slight nod.

“Per the stipulations of our contract with them, Amelia and a few members of her team will be in this office approximately three times per week for the next twelve weeks,” I ensured we were all on the same page. “Assuming everything goes well, which is almost guaranteed with this team, they will love our work and give us full reins after phase one, as agreed. Her team will arrive after lunch today, and I expect everyone to welcome them warmly. However, I’m confident that won’t be an issue for this team. Connor, would you like to say a few words?”

“Thank you, Blake,” Connor joined me at the front of the room. He had relaxed. His faith in me was slowly coming back. “I want to sincerely thank each and every one of you for your hard work over the last few weeks and the work you’ll put in over the coming months. We have an incredible amount of talent and dedication in this room, so I am sure that you will blow them away. We could not do what we do without this incredible team. I look forward to seeing what you all come up with and embark on taking this company to the next level.”

“Thank you, Connor,” I watched him return to his seat. “Now, we have about ten minutes before the official meeting starts. Lainee, please help the California team get settled in. Please eat a muffin from Gabby’s and enjoy a cup of coffee. We’ll need our energy today as we prepare to hit the ground running.”

Everyone continued their conversations from when the team first walked in. I quickly excused myself, escaping to my office.

Before I could face Erik for one more second in any capacity, I had to compose myself. Seeing him elicited more conflicting feelings than I expected. I closed the door and collapsed on my chair, feeling the air leave my lungs. The day had barely started, and I was already overwhelmed. If this pattern held, I was in for a chaotic three months.

“Do I not even deserve a hello?” Erik stormed into my office seconds later. “What am I? Chopped liver?”

Obviously, this was off to a great start.

“Not right now, Erik,” I pleaded, facing the window behind me. I focused on the people walking below, trying to find an ounce of calm to hook onto. “I can’t do this right now.”

“Blake, please look at me,” he stepped closer, but I kept my gaze locked on the people walking down below. “Blake Elena, look at me. Do you really hate me so much that you can’t look me in the eye?”

He was wrong. I didn’t hate him. Everything would be so much easier if what I felt for him was pure hate.

I swiveled my chair toward him but kept my eyes on the ground.

“I’m not going to berate you, but after three years of barely talking to you and the first time seeing you since you left, I didn’t even get so much as a hello?”

“I welcomed you and your team. I don’t know what you mean.”

My breath trembled as I wiped the tear tittering on the edge of my eye. Thankfully, I opted for waterproof mascara so it would last longer, not knowing it would also prevent the black streaks I feared would appear on my cheeks. I had never cried at work before.

“I don’t care about the team. I want you to look at me and acknowledge me, acknowledge the fact that I still exist. I want to see your eyes,” his voice was as broken as I felt. He always said my eyes were his favorite part of me, yet he had never seen their color. “Please, Button, let me see your eyes.”

Button.

Erik was the one person in the world that called me anything but my name. He gave me that nickname when we were eight years old. I dared him to swallow a bug, which he did. He dared me to swallow a button, and I wouldn’t be outdone. My parents were not happy with the doctor’s visit that ensued, but it stuck.

The nickname hung in the air, forcing me to look at him. Tormented eyes. Sad smile. Twenty years of memories rushed into my mind. The heartbreak of the day I left felt as fresh as it was three years ago.

He hesitantly walked behind my desk and grabbed my hand, slowly prompting me to stand from the comfort of my chair. He studied me as if three years had made me unrecognizable before pulling me into his chest. I crashed against him and wrapped my arms around his waist. The smell of clean linens and detergent crowded my nose.

“I’m sorry I stormed in, but can you talk to me? Please?”

“Not here. Not at work.”

“Okay,” he whispered, almost inaudible. “I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too,” I matched his tone. I didn’t realize I meant those words until they escaped my mouth. I could hear his heart from where my head landed on his chest. He squeezed me tighter before pulling away, and I took a few steps back. It was my turn to look at him.

He had always taken care of himself, so it didn’t surprise me that he was still in perfect shape. Thin yet toned. His dark hair was longer, reaching almost past his ears. I hadn’t seen it like that since high school, but it was always my favorite look of his. It made him seem relaxed and boyish. The button-down with rolled-up sleeves tucked perfectly into his black slacks was his signature look.

He looked good, and I wanted to hate him for it.

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