Page 19 of Fiendish Ways

“You were right, though. You hadn’t really done anything to be treated like an untrustworthy child. King and you both deserved to have a friend.”

From the corner of his eye, Cree saw Nebraska make a dismissive gesture. “It doesn’t really matter now. We both made mistakes. Some were bigger than others. The damage is done. All we can do is move forward.”

That was fair. Cree still wanted to grovel, though. But, at the end of the day, actions spoke louder than words. He needed to prove he could do better, or he didn’t deserve Nebraska. “So, Mexican?”

“That sounds amazing.” Cree heard the smile in Nebraska’s voice. He hoped that meant they were headed in the right direction. Only time would tell. For now, he just wanted to be exactly where he was: with Nebraska.

Since Nebraska never went anywhere, he enjoyed looking at everything. There were sombreros on the wall mixed with an Aztec paint scheme. As curious as the restaurant made him, his gaze kept finding its way back to Cree. Cree stared at the menu on the table, as if scared to look anywhere else. Since Cree had gotten them takeout from here several times, Nebraska already knew what he wanted. He always got the same thing. They had already ordered drinks. Now all Nebraska had to focus on was them.

“What made you decide to shave your head?”

Cree’s sexy blue gaze lifted and focused on Nebraska. “I don’t know, really. Frustration combined with a driving need to change, I suppose.”

Nebraska nodded. “It’s nice.”

“Your hair is getting thicker.”

A chuckle escaped Nebraska. “It never gets longer. Only thicker and curlier.” He shrugged. “I can’t drive. Not that I have a car anyhow, and I don’t have people around anymore who cut hair.” While living with Cree, there had never been a need for him to go anywhere. Professionals were in and out of the house all day, providing services so they didn’t have to risk their safety by going anywhere. Living alone meant giving up housekeepers and cooks. It meant no haircuts and a dozen other things. Nebraska depended on Nebraska now. In some ways, it was preferable. In other ways, it was isolating.

“If you want, after we eat, I can take you to get it cut. I’m sorry I’ve been too self-involved to realize how much you’re missing because of me.”

A smile exploded across Nebraska’s face. “You’re apologizing again.”

Cree stayed serious. “I’m sorry. I love you more than anything in this world, and every day I have to wake up knowing I hurt you and failed you. Apologizing for that isn’t a habit I think I can break.”

Nebraska took a breath. He didn’t know how to respond. As much as he wanted to say he loved Cree too, he couldn’t risk Cree using that love against him again. He wasn’t ready. Thankfully, their server appeared, saving him.

“Are you ready to order?”

Nebraska looked Cree’s way.

Cree shrugged. “I’m ready if you are.”

With a nod, Nebraska ordered, and then listened while Cree did. When they were alone again, they fell into a companionable silence. After a few minutes of sipping their drinks and avoiding each other’s stare, something odd happened. They both reached across the table at the same time and joined hands. A shaky breath escaped Nebraska. He missed being touched. Their meal came, and they ate without talking about anything heavy. The food disappeared. Way too soon for Nebraska’s heart, they were headed back to the SUV. He let Cree take him for a haircut just so he could have more time.

By the time Cree walked him to his door, a sadness settled into Nebraska’s soul. He knew their time had ended. Cree wouldn’t try to stay, and Nebraska wasn’t ready to make the offer. Everything felt tenuous, as if it hung by a string.

They stopped at the door. Cree shoved his hands in his pockets. “Home safe and sound. Thank you for going with me.”

“Thank you for the invitation.”

Neither of them moved.

Cree broke first. “Well, I guess I should let you get back to it.”

Nebraska had no idea what that meant, but he understood they were equally unsure. “Okay. Thanks again for everything.”

Cree nodded.

Nebraska stuck his key in the door.

“So, I was thinking.”

“Yes?” Nebraska turned back Cree’s way with more than a little hope in his heart.

Cree still looked uncomfortable. “Maybe I can come by tomorrow and start teaching you how to drive.”

A smile exploded through Nebraska. “That would be amazing.”

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