Page 37 of Reclaimed

His hand reached down and slid under my dress and between my legs, his fingers slipping inside my underwear.

“Even if you won’t answer me, your body always does.”

He was right. My body was even more resolved about trusting Ray than my mind was. And his possessiveness coupled with the memories of last night was coaxing me back into a state of pliant arousal. His fingers plunged inside me, and I grabbed tightly onto his shoulders, moaning in desperation. This already wasn’t enough. I needed him.

“Master, please…”

For once, his smug smile didn’t infuriate me. He was getting what he wanted, but so was I.

“What is it you need, little one?”

“You, Master. Please… please, fuck me.”

Ray groaned, turning me towards the bed and pushing me harshly down.

“You slut.” I heard him loosen his belt and unzip his jeans. “You’ve acted so coy all this time, but we both know you wanted this all along.”

And then he was thrusting into me again, harder this time. He pulled my hair back, forcing me to arch my back more and deepening the angle of penetration. I felt no fear this time – Ray had taken all that away for me and left me with just the pleasure. It was fast, rough, desperate – the kind of sex where you don’t even have time to think. Whatever I needed, he gave me.

We lay there together in silence for a few minutes. I heard Ray’s breathing gradually return to normal. He turned to me, a playful smile on his face that made me want to give myself to him all over again.

“You know I had planned to let you wait at least twenty-four hours.”

“Maybe you don’t know me as well as you think then.”

“Mmmm, I should have known you’d be desperate for more.” He draped an arm over me and closed his eyes. My blissful high was quickly fading away. ‘Desperate’ seemed like a fitting word. I’d willingly let this man conquer me, not just once, but twice. What was wrong with me that I could still want him after everything? I wondered what Ray was thinking. Was he smug that his plan had worked? Was he gleefully imagining rubbing my surrender in David’s face? David would have hated me if he could have seen me then.

“How do you do this to me?” My voice broke, and Ray’s eyes flew open.

“Hey, hey…” His thumb started rubbing slowly to and fro across my temple. “What’s going on? You were happy a second ago.”

“Well, I shouldn’t have been.”

Ray wiped my tears away before I had time to reach for them. “Callie, why on earth do you think you don’t deserve to be happy?”

“It’s not that, I just wish different things made me happy.”

“Not me?”

“Not any of this.”

Ray sighed, and I could tell he was trying to decide whether or not to say his next words.

“What happened when we were apart that made you so ashamed of who you are?” I had known that was the position he’d take. He was leaping at the chance to blame David for something. I was never going to be able to speak openly with him about any of this without his jealousy taking over.

“Forget it.” I tried to turn away and sit up but yelped when he pulled me back down and pinned my hands to the bed. He loomed over me like a storm cloud. Even after trusting him with my body yet again, I couldn’t help the spark of genuine fear that his physicality ignited in me. Whenever he thought about David, he became incensed, and I didn’t trust him not to really hurt me in that moment.

“You’re going to stay here so we can talk about this.”

“I won’t talk to you about him; I’ve seen what it does to you.”

“Look, I’ve made no secret of the fact that I loathe David, but it’s not my intention to bad-mouth him right now. You used to be fine with everything we were doing. Something changed. You need to let this out because it’s clearly eating you up inside. Talk to me. I won’t hurt you, I promise.” He leant down slowly and kissed my cheek. “He didn’t want the same things as you, did he?”

“He… he called me a nymphomaniac.” I smiled. It was funny… and it wasn’t.

Ray, for one, didn’t seem amused. “Because you wanted sex?”

“Because I wanted it too much, and the wrong kind. Because what’s normal wasn’t… it didn’t seem enough to me.”

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