Page 16 of Mad As Hell

I felt used and dirty and craved being clean. The water rained down my body, swirling around the drain to rinse away the feel of strange hands and beady eyes from my flesh.

Hell, the last several months could go down the drain, too, as far as I was concerned.

I lost track of time as I stood under the water, taking the time to scour every inch of my body before I shut off the shower.

The bathroom was one giant cloud of steam as I towel-dried off. I wrapped the towel around my chest and knotted it and then shook my hair loose before going to my bedroom to grab pajamas.

I stumbled to a stop with a gasp when I realized I wasn’t alone.

Ryan slowly stood up from where he’d been sitting on the edge of my bed. His expression gave nothing away even as his blue gaze swept the length of my body before meeting my eyes. “Hey, Maddie.”

CHAPTER 5

MADDIE

There was a special sort of agony reserved for seeing someone you loved who had betrayed you.

After the shitty two weeks I’d just had, my first instinct at seeing Ryan was to run and bury myself against his chest. I knew he could help shoulder the weight that was threatening to crush me.

But then it all went to hell when I remembered that he was the reason I was so broken. He hadn’t just turned his back on me. No, first he had ripped out my heart and stomped on it before leaving me in the dust.

“Get out,” I whispered, barely able to move my lips.

He flinched. “Mads—”

“Get out!” I screamed the words as I felt my heart crack wide open.

Gary hadn’t broken me, but Ryan would. I hadn’t shed a tear yet, but now I could feel them threatening to drown me.

His lips pressed together, his face pained. “Baby, you need to listen to me.”

I clutched the knot in my towel. “Get out. Get out. Get out!” I chanted the words like I could invoke some magic to make him vanish.

His eyes narrowed and his jaw clenched. I knew that determined look in his eyes meant he wasn’t going anywhere.

“I don’t want you here. Get the fuck out of my room and out of my life!” I was bordering on hysterical now, but this was too much.

Ryan Cain was too much for me to handle.

He held up his hands and stayed where he was. “Maddie, I need to know if you’re okay. Bex said—”

“I don’t care what Bex said!” I resisted the urge to slap my hands over my ears and hum a Christmas song.

He sucked in a deep breath. “Calm down, Mads.”

“Don’t tell me to fucking calm down, Ryan!” I snarled as my heart thundered in my chest. I blinked and—dammit all to hell—tears fell from my eyes and dripped down my cheeks.

He closed his eyes like the sight of me crying was too much for him to bear.

Not fucking likely.

He was probably relishing this. Loved seeing me broken down and defeated.

I felt exposed and vulnerable, and it had nothing to do with the fact that I was naked under my towel.

Surprisingly, he took a step back and his shoulders hunched in… defeat? “I’ll go, okay? I didn’t mean to upset you.”

My head was spinning, and I realized that my breathing was ragged and choppy. I was actually hyperventilating.

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