Page 17 of Mad As Hell

“Just… shit. Let me call Bex first, okay? I can’t leave you alone like this, Maddie.”

Darkness blurred the edges of my vision as my knees wobbled. I managed to brace a hand on the wall before squeezing my eyes shut and focusing on my breathing.

I was dimly aware of Ryan’s voice as he barked orders at someone. Minutes bled together as I sank deeper and deeper into a pit that was going to swallow me whole. A hand brushed my shoulder, pushing my hair from my face and I shuddered because I knew that touch.

That touch had been my everything once. And now it was a blistering reminder of all I’d lost.

With a cry, I wrenched myself away from Ryan and tumbled into the bathroom. My back slammed against the counter as I slipped on the slick tiles and went down.

Firm hands grabbed my arms long enough to deposit me on the floor without any more injury, but immediately the hands were gone and I was alone. So endlessly alone.

I curled up, bringing my knees to my chest and wrapping my arms around my shins as I rocked and tried to stop crying.

A soft voice entered the room next before someone else was dropping down beside me.

“Maddie? Maddie, hey. It’s me, Bex.” She started to reach for me and then stopped. “I’m going to hold your hand, okay? It’s just me.”

Gentle fingers slowly pried one of my hands from my leg.

“Can you try taking a deep breath?” Bex encouraged, her quiet voice steadying me with its kindness.

I managed a trembling breath that rushed out in a small whimper.

“Bex—”

“Get out, Ryan.” I’d never heard her voice sound so cold and brittle. “Haven’t you done enough damage?”

A low growl filled the space. “I didn’t do this.”

“What did you expect would happen if you showed up and surprised her?” Bex demanded, fiercely protective as she crouched between us. I didn’t have to look up to know she was glaring at him.

“I just needed to make sure she was okay,” he answered roughly. “I can’t… Fuck, Bex, I know I messed up.”

“And now you’re making it worse,” she snapped. “So, go. Leave us alone.”

Ryan didn’t move, and I could practically hear him thinking, working over the situation in his head and trying to figure out his next move.

“Fine,” he agreed in a low voice. “But tell her—”

“I’m not telling her shit,” Bex spat. “If you want to try and beg forgiveness, don’t use me to do it. If it were up to me? Maddie would never have to see you again.”

A soft laugh came from Ryan, totally void of humor. “I’m glad she has you.”

Bex’s hand tightened around mine. “She does. Now leave.”

“I’ll be back, Mads. We’re not done,” he said gently, and it felt like a promise more than a threat.

I didn’t lift my head until I heard the front door close. Then I peered up at Bex through a tangled mess of blonde hair.

Her hazel eyes were wet with unshed tears as she held my hand with one of hers and used the other to stroke my head like I was a scared puppy.

I started to open my mouth, but the words got stuck.

Her eyes narrowed. “I swear, Madison, if you’re about to apologize, I’ll… Well, I don’t know what exactly, but think of something bad, and it’ll be that.”

I choked on an unexpected laugh, and she smiled.

“I’m okay,” I finally managed to get out.

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