Page 65 of Sean

“We heard from Helen and Sophie that the two of you had gotten together.”

“We’re not together anymore. It’s over.” Sean had pictured what a life with Julia and the kids could look like. Maybe more than pictured it. He’d full on fanaticized. But that was done. Reality had slapped him in the face when she’d nearly been killed.

“She dumped you?” Owen said and didn’t pause for Sean to respond. “It’s okay, man. You can win her back. She’s probably just upset about all the shit that’s gone down. It’s a lot for someone who isn’t used to it. Give her time.”

“He’s right,” Ethan chimed in. “This stuff’s tough on civilians, but she’ll come around.”

“If you dig into it,” Owen said, “there’s a whole subreddit about bodyguard and bodyguardee relationships. It explains all the ups and downs that can happen.”

“Seriously? That’s a thing? And you read up on it?” Ethan asked.

“Yeah, Soph and I had a rough patch. I did some research. You know I’m all about the intel,” Owen said, defending himself. Owen was about getting information, but what they were speculating about was entirely useless.

Sean wanted to put an end to the conversation. “I’m the one who broke it off, and we won’t be getting back together.” He just needed to get through what he hoped would be only a few days, and then he and Julia could go their separate ways for good.

The other two men exchanged a look before Owen pointed to Ethan, indicating that he should do the talking. “Explain yourself,” Ethan demanded. “I don’t know Julia, but everything I’ve heard about her, especially the risks she’s taken to protect Helen and that niece and nephew of hers, tells me that she’s an impressive woman. You seemed convinced of that a few days ago. Why don’t you want her now?”

His buddies weren’t going to back off. Shit, Sean hated talking about relationships. Avoiding them was a hell of a lot simpler. “I don’t want to deal with…the baggage.”

“By which you mean your feelings, like concern for those you love.”

“It’s easier to keep to myself.” Sean tried to defend his point.

“Freakin’ lonely, though,” Owen added.

Sean could manage loneliness. He’d dealt with it just fine for the past four years. He had no idea what to do with the love—okay, yeah, love—that he felt for Julia. Because love was complicated and led to all sorts of other feelings. And love left you wide open to getting your heart ripped out if something went wrong. He wasn’t risking putting himself through that again.

“You’re a dumbass,” Ethan said, getting in Sean’s face. “I almost lost Helen, my wife of ten years, and I can tell you that hurt like hell. But I’d go through that pain all over again if I had to if it meant that in the end, I could have the happiness we’ve found now. And even if Helen had decided that we were really done, that she couldn’t handle what it takes to be with me, I wouldn’t have regretted the years I spent loving her. And I’d still love her. She’s the best thing that ever happened to me, and nothing is ever going to change that. I think Julia could be the best thing that ever happened to you, but you’re stupidly making a choice to walk away from what the two of you could have.”

Sean wanted to argue against Ethan’s words…but he couldn’t. He was making a choice to walk away from the happiness he and Julia could have. But he still felt he had to make that choice. He feared the pain that love could bring, and in the end, that fear was stronger than any hope that he had for happiness. Julia was right. He was a coward at heart.

He eyed both his buddies. “I need you guys to drop it. We’ve got a job to do, and we don’t need a distraction.”

Ethan and Owen exchanged another look but kept their opinions to themselves.

THIRTY-FOUR

“Mom, you okay with that?” Julia asked. Her mother wanted to help with dinner preparation, so Kelly had given her the task of slicing loaves of bread to make garlic toast.

“I’m good. I’ll consider it therapy to strengthen my motor skills.” Charlotte cut the end off a loaf. Her movements were slow, but only a smidge awkward. It was a relief to see that the effects of the stroke were lessening.

“We’re going to make amazing garlic toast,” Helen said. Given her pregnancy, the other women wanted Helen off her feet, so she was working with Charlotte.

“More pasta?” Kelly asked. “I’ve never been a good judge of how much to put in the pot.”

Tara inspected the pot. “I’d go with more. Lots of mouths to feed. The sauces smell wonderful, Julia.”

She was making both a rich alfredo sauce for the adults and a simple marinara that the kids would like. “Recipes from my mom.”

Charlotte laughed. “One of the few things that I made well. I was glad when you and Mira took over making dinner. I was always beat after a long workday.”

Her mother loved to talk about Mira, recall the funny things she did or the way she loved her kids. Julia let her talk. It was painful at times to listen, but she never wanted to forget all the things she’d loved about her sister. And it was good for the kids to hear about their mom.

“We didn’t mind,” Julia said. “We did make a mess sometimes, though.” She stirred the marinara sauce and turned the flame down under it. Keeping watch over the stove was good for her. It kept her focused so that she didn’t worry about Wilson’s machinations or the destruction of her relationship with Sean. They’d avoided each other as much as possible throughout the day, but it still hurt to see him or even think about him. Having her friends here helped strengthen her. Although seeing how happy they were with their men did make her sad and wistful for what she could have had.

She glanced out the window to check on the kids—they were all outside, playing, with Emmy supervising. Without her intending it, Julia’s eyes caught on where Sophie was talking with Owen. He leaned toward her to kiss her temple, a gesture so sweet and intimate that it made Julia’s heart ache. When Sophie returned to the kitchen, Julia had to avert her eyes. She didn’t want to see the happy smile on her friend’s face. Apparently, it wasn’t to be avoided because Sophie came straight toward Julia to lean against the counter.

“Owen just told me that you and Sean broke up,” Sophie said in a low tone. “Are you okay?”

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