Page 60 of Forgive Me For I Have Sinned

"There is nothing you can do to fix it. Some people are destined for a great life, to fall in love, be happily married or happily single, and have gorgeous children. I'm not one of those people.” I look at the high school kids laughing like they're in slow motion. The helpless feeling I hate making its way under my skin. "I've tried everything, and it all boils down to what I'm destined to be…unworthy of having anything good."

"I don't think that."

A laugh bubbles out of my throat, causing me to drop the sandwich. "A few days ago, I found that highly unlikely. You threw me out of your mother's house because I was there when she called me, so I could pick up a dress she bought, saving me from having to buy one because––" I trail off.

"Because?"

Rolling my eyes, I finish what I was about to say, "Because I'm broke. I make twelve bucks an hour plus tips. Do you know how much they take out in taxes or how much one of those dresses costs when you make peanuts?"

"Charles Devlin doesn't buy you clothes?"

"Ha! Unless it's out with him for some stupid ball or to sell me off. Oh…I can't wear the same thing twice because, God forbid, I embarrass the sick bastard. The only thing I do have is a roof over my head with utilities included."

I don't tell him I shower in the dorms because Charles found it amusing to install only bathtubs in the entire mansion to punish me.

"Stay with me."

I lift my gaze and see in his expression that he's serious. "Why?" I shake my head. "It won't change anything."

"There is something I want to change."

What would he want to change? In my mind, there is nothing that could, except my existence.

"What is that?"

"Our first time."

CHAPTER 24

Alaric

Relief settles inside me, seeing her in the passenger seat of my Bentley. I went crazy looking for her since yesterday, after telling Tara to never contact me again and that I was terminating any business we had from her father's company. She accused me of using her, but the truth was, she had an expiration date, and it was passed due. What I fear happened when Veronica walked in. I couldn't panic, but I did after Tara stormed out.

I looked for her everywhere. I even called Valen, who told me to check the dorm showers, but I couldn't. It was too early, and I was not a creep looking in the women's showers, knowing they would be occupied. I decided to give her a day and would try again today until I had to bribe Dorothy to redo her kitchen so she would give me Adam's address. I swear that woman hates me.

"I missed you," I tell her.

I did. I couldn't sleep last night. I never thought I would ever need a woman to fall asleep, but I find that I need her. I want the warmth of her hair and the smell of the shampoo I bought her. The feel of her skin on mine, her lips parting when she is in a deep sleep. Lips I kiss when she isn't aware that I'm doing it.

After we shower, I drape a towel over my neck and notice her splayed out on the bed in one of the sets I bought her.

My cock instantly goes hard when my eyes slide over the slit between her legs from the crotchless panties that attach to the lace pieces on her hips. She’s holding herself up with the palms of her hands behind her as her dark hair falls like a waterfall down her back.

I swallow hard. "You're gorgeous."

She always was. I walk over to a drawer and open it, pulling out the thigh-high socks similar to the ones she wore that night.

I watch her eyes widen when she spots them in my hand. "You weren't kidding."

"No. I'm not," I answer, handing them to her, so she can put them on and I can watch.

I wish I was a superhero with powers that could take us back in time. Because that night was a setup. They ruined us, and I was too blind to see it. I can still see the terror and horror in her beautiful innocent eyes replaying in my mind on repeat. The look she gave me screamed for help, but all I could see was betrayal. Her father had people watching her every move, but so did I. Except yesterday, and I was terrified. Sometimes it takes a person to disappear for a moment, knowing you might not get them back to realize what the mystery of death means. The end of the world you're currently a part of.

When she slides the last sock over her soft thighs, I kneel on the bed, feeling it dip with my weight. "Is this okay?"

She knows what I mean. I want her to want this as much as I want it. I slide the towel off my neck and kneel, completely naked, between her thighs.

"Hard or soft," I ask.

---