Page 59 of The English Queen

“It does not seem quite right,” Elise said.

“I know it looks dreadful. And, yes, it makes me feel off. I’m knackered, but it’s not a problem. I move on with my life unless I have a particularly dreadful one. Stress causes them. My mother’s cancer does not help.”

“It’s not all of this then? The job is—”

“It’s not this. This gives me life. I love to talk to people. Going on this tour without Louis is less than ideal, but I had such a good time today with you. My stress emanates from across the ocean. It’s not here in Belgium.”

While Beth was strong in her words, she worried Elise did not believe her. The damage had already been done.

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“I ruined your dinner. And your plans.” Beth looked exhausted.

Louis squeezed her hand reassuringly. “You didn’t ruin anything. It happens.”

“I am sorry. I am.”

“Beth, I have been unavailable for days. I am the one who needs to make up for things. You cannot help it.”

Louis was grateful Beth was okay. He felt such guilt for being away so long. The distance had been short, but the void wide.

“It’s okay. Let me sleep. I’ll wake up fine tomorrow.”

Louis kissed her. “I love you, mijn maanstraal.”

“I love you, darling,” she rolled sideways.

She already started to fade.

Beth came home and tried to play it brave, but Louis swiftly put her to bed. They’d taken their dinner watching some “repeat” of a British comedy on a streaming channel. It wasn’t the romantic evening Louis had planned, but Louis was grateful to see Beth. It was the first evening he had time to himself let alone the two of them. While he wished it had gone differently, he relieved.

Louis settled into their sitting room, but his mother disrupted his peace. She had been near-insufferable over the past few weeks. Her meddling and needling of his siblings were about to set him off. Marta resisted returning for Christmas. He was sure if Beth wasn’t there, she would have stayed on in Paris.

“How is she?” Elise asked.

“Fine,” Louis replied. “She’s asleep now. We had dinner in our room. She’s fine.”

“It was horrifying. Had we not left, what would have happened? And the media were there. They would have seen the whole show.”

“She notified her staff she saw the signs and they handled it to protocol. She did everything she could to make it work. It’s scary, Mama. I get it. However, it happens sometimes.”

“Well, it seems to happen a lot. And her job is demanding. Is she cut out—”

“Mother, this is the most stressful time. She’s about to marry me, she’s dealing with her mother’s impending death, she’s stepped in for Robbie, and it’s all a lot for any person.”

“She is fragile.”

Louis recoiled.

He spoke with authority, “I hate when people say that! Beth has overcome so much in her life. She was born sick. She has fought every day. She is strong. She has a condition, but he is resilient. She is brave. She is compassionate. She is charming beyond imagination. She is so many things, she is so far from fragile.”

“It is hard for me to see her managing—”

“Mother, please. This is the unfortunate consequence of her changing medications, alright? It’s not stress. It’s not anything she can’t handle, Mama. It’s her medication—”

“And why? Did she have to do that now. You’re getting married in less than three months—”

“Mother, she’s doing this for our benefit.”

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