Page 4 of My Heart for Yours

I get to Derick’s house about ten minutes later. Despite his rocky past he is still a successful architect and his home reflects his status. Personally, I never much cared for such things as status and worldly possessions, but nobody ever said we shared the same taste. That was never our problem.

I walk up to his front door which swings open before I have a chance to knock and Derick stands before me looking relieved, as if he thought I might not show up. How long has it been since the last time I saw him? After Layla’s confession of what happened between them and the car accident the very next day that took her life. I’d seen him at the funeral and then only a handful of times since. Well, I guess it’s time to set things right.

Our greeting is all kinds of awkward as he moves in for a hug while I extend my hand for a shake, but he leads me into his large open-plan living room, and I take a seat on a very expensive-looking leather couch.

“I’m really glad you came, man. You look good. Are things going well at the bar?” His nerves show in how quickly he delivers these lines, and I almost feel sorry for him. Almost.

“Yeah man, everything’s good, but if you don’t mind, I’d like to get to the reason I’m here. I think we’ve been dancing around each other long enough, don’t you?” He seems relieved to hear this and I can’t blame him for thinking that I would not be open to a discussion. I’ve been the one to create distance between us after all, but maybe everybody is right. It’s time to put this behind us and move on.

“Yes, definitely, but let me start, okay?” I brace for what’s about to come out of his mouth and nod my head. Derick doesn’t waste any time. “You know I was blind drunk that night, right? Completely out of it. I had no idea what was going on until I woke up the next morning with Layla next to me in bed. I started freaking out, but she just lay there, calm as can be like it was the most natural thing in the world for her to be in her fiancé’s brother’s bed. I swear to you, Shane, if I were sober it never would have happened. Layla and I were never like that. I still can’t figure out why she sought me out that night, except that I was the easy target and the one who would get your attention.” And there lies the crux of the matter. Derick and I used to be close and Layla knew this. She orchestrated the whole thing to get my attention and used Derick because he was the sure thing. He has a drinking problem; he is an alcoholic and two stints in rehab and regular AA meetings are not going to change that fact. For the rest of his life, he will have to fight the urge to have a drink and live with the mistakes he made while under the influence, but what happened between him and Layla had nothing to do with him and everything to do with Layla feeling like she didn’t have my attention. I can choose to support Derick or continue to punish him, but that would be unfair to him and it’s not what I want. Of course, I am not without blame for what happened and that is something I’m going to have to take a good hard look at, but for now I need to forgive my brother because he needs it, and so do I.

Lisa

I’m outside the inn packing the last of my things into my Jeep. Mrs. Hanson, who owns The Lemon & Lime Inn, was upset that I was leaving earlier than planned, but once I explained to her that it was for personal reasons and not because I was unhappy with the accommodations, she made me promise to come back soon to visit. Crossing my fingers behind my back seemed silly but I made the promise anyway.

“Where are you off to in such a hurry, short stuff? I thought you were staying a couple of days.” I think my heart might have stopped for a moment, but it’s just Jared. How did he sneak up on me like that?

“My plans changed, but it was nice meeting you, Jared. You must take care.” I can’t guess what he’s reading in my tone, but his voice dips low and concern shows on his face.

“I told you to call me Jay, and let me guess, Shane has something to do with this sudden change in plans.” How did he guess? Does he know Shane saw me this morning?

“What makes you think that? He has nothing to do with it. I just figured it was time to move on.” Ugh, who am I kidding? I look everywhere but directly at him because something tells me he’s going to know I’m full of shit the moment he looks into my eyes.

“Riiiiight. Look, I know he acts like an asshole sometimes, but his heart is in the right place. Don’t rush off because of something he said, okay? Trust me, I know him better than anyone and whatever it was, he didn’t mean it. There’s a lot going on that you don’t know about. And if it counts for anything, I really want you to stay.” Huh? Now I look up at him because that was quite a speech.

“Wow, you really went there with the emotional blackmail, didn’t you?” I try and give him a stern look, but he sees right through me. Smart guy.

“Of course, but I’m doing it with the best of intentions.” His smirk is back in place and a dimple has joined the party. Jeez, what is it with these guys?! If I had half of Jay’s confidence, I’d … still be leaving town with my tail between my legs, because Shane is right. It doesn’t matter anyway.

“Riiiiiight.” I copy the tone he used earlier.

“Did it work?” Dammit, I really want to stay, but…

“I told him I would leave, Jay. I don’t stay where I’m not wanted. Been there, done that. Burned the t-shirt.” He quirks an eyebrow, obviously processing what I said, but I haven’t given him enough information to guess my meaning and I’m still not one hundred percent convinced that Jay doesn’t have some secret agenda of his own. In fact, the longer I stand here talking to him, the more I’m convinced that he’s up to something, but it’s not malicious. Don’t ask me how I know but I don’t feel threatened by him at all.

“And besides, I’ve given up my room here. I don’t have anywhere to stay.” It’s a pathetic attempt and Jay sees right through it.

“Don’t be ridiculous. Mrs. Hanson will give you your room back in a heartbeat and if she doesn’t you can come stay at my place. I have plenty of space. In fact, …” He seems quite excited about this idea forming in his head.

“No!” I cut him off. “Its fine, I’ll stay here, but at some point, you are going to explain to me why this is so important to you.” The smile on his face could light up the entire state and I know I’ve been played, but somehow it doesn’t bother me as much as it should.

Jay helps me carry all my stuff back to the inn where Mrs. Hanson is waiting as if she knew all of this was going to happen. Her face lights up when she sees Jay and I swear she looks like she’s blushing, even though Jay must be a good twenty years younger than her. Once I’m settled back in the same room I had before, I decide to go exploring and Jay immediately offers to play tour guide. I must admit I’m relieved because I’m suddenly very nervous about running into Shane and having to explain to him why I’m still here.

Here’s the problem, by telling him I would leave, I basically admitted that I am in fact in trouble. Not because of anything I did. Having a stalker just seems so trivial in the grand scheme of things. I’m not naïve. I know Cole is dangerous and that there is a chance he will try and find me, but I was hoping that he would give up once he realized I’m no longer in Chicago and that the police were looking into him. Up till now his actions have been limited to dropped phone calls or that heavy breathing thing they always show in the movies, showing up at random places I like to go to, and recently sending gifts to my apartment. That is the part that is freaking me out; him knowing where I live, and it prompted me to contact the police shortly after. He’s escalating but not being overtly threatening, so the police can’t arrest him. Joe is keeping an eye on things for me. Being a retired police detective still allows him some access and he’s keeping me updated of any new developments, of which there’ve been none over the past few weeks.

“Hey, you can’t walk down the street with me and have that frown on your face. It’s not good for my image.” Jay must have noticed my thoughts were thousands of miles away. I scoff and lay on the sarcasm.

“Sorry, I’ll try harder to make you look good seeing as your image obviously needs all the help it can get.” He winks at me.

“Appreciate it.” This earns him a genuine smile. Jay is very handsome and has charm in spades and yet he’s spending his time with me instead of the many women I’ve seen staring at him as we walk through town.

“Why are you doing this, hanging out with me I mean?” I regret the words the moment they leave my mouth. I don’t have issues with self-worth, despite my upbringing. Growing up with a mother who might have loved the bottle more than she loved me taught me to take care of myself from an early age, because grown-ups couldn’t always be trusted with the job. I never knew my father and I don’t have any siblings, so I always found it easier to keep to myself, which means my social skills might be a bit out of practice.

“Because I want to would be the obvious answer. Don’t you hang out with friends back home?” I don’t reply and he side eyes me for a few steps before asking, “You don’t have many friends do you?” I can tell he’s not being mean, just curious, so I shrug because there’s not much to say. “Well, then I think you should get the full experience while you’re here. I have loads of friends. I’ll share mine with you.” He smirks again and I make the decision to give it an honest try, to be a friend to him and his many friends.

“You really are a prince among men, Jay.” He puffs out his chest, obviously happy with my assessment.

“Damn straight. What made you decide to take a trip by yourself, just before Christmas no less?” Here goes nothing.

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