Page 98 of Two to Tango

If Alice is water, Izzy is fire. What I feel for Izzy is not calm, passive, past. It’s exciting, scary, hot, and so very present. It’s real, tangible, and something I want back.

Alice is happy without me. I see that. She was young when her parents told her she couldn’t be in love with me.

Maybe… what if Izzy isn’t happy without me? What if she does want something different from what her parents want for her, and I was too afraid to wait and find out?

As the light changes, I look down at my bicep and the image of Alice in Wonderland I had inked on me a lifetime ago. I decide to make one more stop before I head home.

39

IZZY

Week 3 Without Brooks

I wake from a dream I can’t remember but one that left me happy and sad and thinking of Brooks. I haven’t heard from him since I sent that text message after my run.

He told me he loved me once. I haven’t stopped loving him and craving him since I last saw him. Could he have stopped wanting me already?

I put on my dance clothes and head down to the studio. Francesca is working with two ballet students when I enter.

‘Izzy, come in. We’re almost finished and I have something I need to discuss with you.’

I nod and sit on the floor to start stretching. I haven’t yet looked at my phone this morning but I take it out now and see I have a message from Brooks. My heart flutters and I press my hand to my stomach.

There are two messages. Both images.

The first is a picture taken through a window looking out toward New York’s skyline. I recognize the Empire State Building immediately. The caption reads:

You were right. I did need a change of scenery. This is the view from my new pad.

‘It’s stunning,’ I whisper for my own benefit.

I click the second image and it takes me a moment to realize that what I am looking at is Brooks’ bicep. I recognize the inked forest that spreads from the beams of sunlight on his chest, the familiar birds and musical notes.

I gasp, dropping my phone. and then retrieve it to double-check what I think I see.Alice in Wonderlandis gone. She has been covered by the face of a girl or woman. The image resembles Cady.

I decided it wasn’t Alice I was clinging to. It was Cady.

I don’t know why but I reply.

What happened?

I’m not sure if he’ll understand from my reply that I’m asking what happened to make him change his perspective on Alice. But he does because, despite whatever unearthly hour it must be in New York, he replies:

I went to their place. Spoke to Alice. Met her husband. She’s wonderful. But she’s not the woman I’m in love with.

My heart starts hammering beneath my ribs, so fiercely I wonder whether it is possible to break your ribs from the inside out. Does he mean he’s over Alice or is he telling me he’s still in love with me?

‘Izzy, I have great news,’ comes a voice, pulling me out of my reverie. I shake my head, trying to clear my erratic thoughts. ‘I was tempted to call you last night, but it was late.’

I look from my phone to Francesca. ‘I’m sorry?’

‘I’ve got you an audition. If you want it. It’s a new musical. It isn’t big yet. And the audition is for a standby role only, but I think you’re good enough.’

I jump to my feet. ‘Oh my God, that’s insane! Thank you, thank you, thank you.’

I throw my arms around her neck, which encourages her to say, ‘But there is a catch…’

‘Oh.’ I step back. ‘What is it?’

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