It was me all along.

21

Just as they said they would, the buyer remains anonymous from start to finish. They provide the earnest money. They have a third party sign on their behalf, and now all that remains is for me to show up and sign for myself. My dad insists on going with me, even though we had the entire property transferred into my name.

“I’m going for moral support,” he says.

But I know it’s because he’s worried this buyer will be there, ready to attack or mock or do who knows what, and he doesn’t want me to be alone if that happens.

Since it’s probably his fault if the person does something.

I spent a lot of time hoping it was Sean, which is ridiculous because I’ve basically been avoiding him since we left Kempton Park. It was almost necessary, actually. Even after all his pressure to let Aleksandr go and sell Obsidian, he was upset about how I handled it.

“I don’t understand how you could just decide he had laminitis and sell him off like that,” he said. “For pennies. To the guy you laid off.”

“It wasn’t pennies,” I countered.

“Did you feel guilty about letting him go?” He sighed. “He was rich, Kris. If he wanted that stallion, he could have paid for him.”

Aleks did offer to repay me for the money I spent on buying him, but that felt. . .wrong somehow. I made all the decisions I made, and I just couldn’t take it.

I did get some prize money for the races on both About Face, who won second place as well, and for Obsidian. Second place is called reserve champion. The purse isn’t as big, but it’s not nothing. It’s just not enough to make much of a difference.

Which is why I specifically had to ask Sean to remove Obsidian Devil as collateral. . .since I didn’t have him anymore. I had to fabricate the sale papers showing that I sold him for twenty grand. Two hundred and fifty to twenty in two months is pretty brutal, and maybe I shouldn’t have had the sale made out to Aleksandr Volkonsky, but it just seemed easier. That way, no one could appear later, claiming that they were short one stallion.

“It’s just. . .it’s going to be hard to justify the huge loss, since he was jumping like a kangaroo at that race,” he said. “A race that was broadcast internationally. He didn’t look like he was close to laminitis.”

The whole thing with Obsidian Devil was set up to make me a loser from the start, but at least I’m finally through with all that.

“Don’t get me wrong,” Sean finally said. “I’m delighted he’s gone, along with that snake of a trainer, but my friend would have paid so much for him—even just as a stud. That money would’ve helped you a lot, I’m sure.”

But the real reason he was upset was that I wouldn’t take money from him, either.

“I know you spent all your funds on that race—you were so sure you’d win.” He shook his head. “It wasn’t prudent.”

I really thought it was, but turns out, like always, Sean was right.

Now that I’m standing in front of the door to the title company, my hope has reached a fever pitch. The only person who could have bought this land that might be good for me is Sean.

And at the same time, if he did that, I’m really stuck.

Because if he’s such a good person that he’d do that for me in spite of me telling him not to? If he knows me well enough to know I’d always insist that he not help, while secretly hoping that he would? Well, it’s substantial evidence of his love, for one. And beyond that, it shows how solid he is in his belief that he and I belong together.

Meanwhile, I grow more unsteady about a future with him every day.

When Aleks left, I thought his memory would fade. But every horse I ride reminds me he’s not Obsidian. Even Five is no substitute. And every time I see a dark-haired, broad-shouldered man, my heart leaps.

None of them are him, of course.

He was only here while he needed me. It makes sense. A prince with magical powers who can shift into the most gorgeous stallion I’ve ever seen? And he even managed to regain his land and wealth?

We’re not evenly matched.

We never were.

In fact, when I think about it, I still wonder why Sean likes me. He offers to give me the money for the loans and taxes daily. He’s done that since the beginning. And if I asked him to, he’d pay the current buyer double just to cancel the contract, and then he’d pay off the note.

I know he would.