‘What’s happened?’ I asked, glancing between them.
Aron was hunched forward, his face crumpled in defeat. Golde sat cross-legged on the table, scratching at its surface with her dagger.
‘I won’t ruin her like this.’ Sebastien’s growl shot through me like ice. He didn’t so much as acknowledge my presence.
‘What’s going on?’ I asked, more firmly.
Finally, he turned and looked at me. The man he’d been that morning was gone, shielded behind stony eyes. ‘I’m sending you home.’
‘Home?’ I repeated, the word foreign on my tongue.
Una’s hazel eyes glistened with pity. ‘We know where Bane’ll be now,’ she mumbled. ‘Probably best if ye . . . don’t come.’
The air pulled taut, straining like the breath in my lungs.
Home. The word on Sebastien’s lips conjured a far different image from the one I knew he meant. There was no cottage or cliffside that could live up to that. But my family . . .
I stared at Sebastien, wishing he’d look at me again. I could hardly reconcile his rigid posture with the man who’d kissed me back to sleep at dawn.
‘Why don’t ye let her choose?’ Aron grumbled.
‘I don’t want her here,’ Sebastien snapped.
I flinched. Didn’t want me walking into battle with him, or didn’t want me at all? Those were two very different things.
He stood and stalked towards the doors, throwing them open. Snow billowed in with the breeze. Still he wouldn’t meet my gaze.
‘Course ye don’t,’ Golde snarled after him. ‘Mer always said ye were a coward.’
I stared in disbelief as Sebastien stormed outside, slamming the doors behind him. A puff of snow spiralled to the ground in his wake and, for once, I felt a chill in the sea air as it swept through me.
My stomach knotted around itself, twisted by anger and betrayal and a sharp, stinging hurt. I don’t want her here. His words were as bitter as the icy wind, tearing to shreds the memories clutched to my chest. After everything . . .
The crew were all watching me, their eyes bright with expectation, and something that looked awfully, dangerously, like hope.
‘I suppose I have you lot to thank for this,’ I said, trying not to sound accusatory.
The pirates in front of me baulked.
‘Thank us, lass?’ Una asked.
‘I assume this was your idea. Trying to keep me away from Bane never seemed like much of a priority; now all of a sudden he wants me gone?’ Why else would Sebastien even suggest letting me go? Unless he really didn’t want me any more.
‘Honoured ye think us so noble,’ Aron replied, scoffing at the thought. ‘But I’d not be parted with ye if I had the choice.’
He hooked an arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his side. I leaned against him, grateful for the sturdiness of his presence when it felt like the world was crumbling around us.
‘It’s not over,’ he said. ‘Just go talk to him.’
I disentangled myself. ‘Why bother? You heard him. He doesn’t want me here.’
Why did they care so much? From the beginning, they’d all seemed so determined to plant seeds of hope in me. But why? And why choose me, of all places, to sow them?
‘He don’t mean what he’s sayin’,’ Aron prompted. ‘Don’t let fear get the best o’ ye.’
‘You’re one to talk,’ I said, glancing from him to Una. Hating how defensive I sounded.
His jaw clenched, voice so quiet I almost missed it. ‘Don’t go there,’ he warned.