I'm really not mad at either her or Bree. I'm more just upset in general. I understand what they were trying to do, and in some ways it's really sweet.
I just don't deal with surprises well—obviously.
When the two of them lead me from my suite and across the entryway to the dining room, I feel like we're on a death row walk or something. Which makes me snort because when did I become so dramatic?
I'm guessing that it's about the same time that I arrived in Rancho Mirage. Without work to keep me focused and too preoccupied to think about much more, I've allowed my omega side to surface more. And that's something I've never done. I've been trying to suppress that bitch since I was eighteen and revealed as an omega.
Which isn't fair. It's a part of me that I should have accepted and learned to live with—not tried to bury it deep.
The three of us come to a stop outside of the closed dining room doors, and I force myself to take a deep breath.
I can do this.
"Do you want us to join you? You know, for moral support or whatever?"
I shake my head. "While I appreciate it, this is something I need to do on my own."
Tessa nods, understanding on her face. "You have our numbers. Once you're done, call us, and we'll come to your suite—if that's what you want, of course. I understand completely if you don't feel comfortable talking to us."
"If I'm going to call anyone, it'll be the two of you or Finnegan. Maybe all of you." I let out a heavy sigh. "While I don't like it, I understand why you did what you did. I don’t condone it in any way, and I beg of you to not do that to any other omegas. I know you tried to give me some kind of warning, but it wasn't enough. You don't have to ruin the big reveal, but maybe have Reginald mention it being someone from the past. I don't know."
Bree squeezes my hand. "I understand what you're saying. If we ever do anything like this again—and I'm highly leaning toward never doing so—I will make sure we better prepare the omega than we did you."
"Good."
"Are you sure you don't want us to stay?" Tessa asks again, pulling a laugh from me.
"Go. The two of you have an entire show to be running, I'm sure there's plenty of shit for you to be doing that doesn't involve holding my hand while I listen to whatever they have to say."
She shrugs. "There's always something that needs to be done, but it doesn't feel right to leave you alone after your initial reaction."
"I'm ready for it this time. I'm sure it'll still be hard, but at least I'm prepared now." I shoo them off with my hands. "Go. Find something to keep yourself busy. Hell, you can watch the conversation on the screens like you usually do—just do it somewhere that isn't here."
The two of them laugh together, but each give me a hug before heading toward the basement. They're absolutely going to watch live footage of this conversation, and I can't even blame them.
Turning back to the closed doors, I roll my shoulders to try to get them to loosen, but it's no use. I'm strung as tight as a bow right now and nothing is going to make it any better except walking into that room and hearing what they have to say.
So I push open the doors.
Chapter Seventeen
Sophia
I hesitate in the doorway, still unsure of myself and of the four men that await me.
My eyes find Chase first. I don't know if it's because he's the least threatening of the four or if it's because he's the one I felt closest to. Or if it's because he's an omega like me. I don't know the whys, but I do know my eyes seek him out first.
All four of their intermingled scents hit me hard. Asher's beach bonfire scent, Liam's rain on a sunny day scent, Carson's ozone scent as a storm moves in, and then there's Chase's scent of literal sunshine. My eyes fall shut as I take another deep breath, filling my lungs with their scents. I'd almost forgotten how all four of them smelled when they were in the same room, and my memories didn't quite do it justice anyway.
The breath I let out is shuddering but also calming.
Allowing my eyes to pop open once more, I take a moment to look at Chase. It's been two years since I've seen his beautiful face, and it's almost like he hasn't changed at all. But that's not quite true. Before there was almost always a smile or a smirk gracing those perfect lips. There are lines on his face that weren't there before that speak of hard times and not so much smiling. I don't like it.
When he stands up, I realize he is as tall as I remembered. He still carries himself in the same way, but he seems more disheveled than even after his heat. This isn't the same man I ran from. His caramel brown hair is still tousled, wavy, and a bit shaggy as it falls around his scruffy face, but now it seems like he's been running his hands through it—as if he's been tugging on it. Don't get me wrong. He's still hot as sin, especially in that tuxedo, but it just isn't the same. He looks worried, lost. Finally allowing myself to meet his piercing green eyes, it takes more effort than it should to not burst into tears.
Chase looks so happy to see me. So disbelieving of the fact that I'm standing before him. There's something else shining in his eyes that I can't name—that I don't want to name—so I force myself to look away even as he takes a step toward me. I skip over Asher, not ready to study him, and fall to Carson.
He also looks the same but not. He was always happy, but there's not even a hint of that smile anywhere. His dark brown eyes are more serious than I saw them when we were at the cabin. He seems older than he should, like he's been shouldering a burden that has continued to drag him further and further down. His honey brown hair is still perfectly in place, and he doesn't seem to have lost any of musculature. But it's like he's lost something else that's a vital part of him, and he's barely holding on.