Page 34 of Running

“I always have. He may only be my husband on paper now and maybe we'll leave when this is over, but I will never not love him. That love is the only thing that kept me going all these years.”

The air shifts in the room. Someone else is here. I hadn’t realized I let my back face the entrance. I know better. It’s dangerous to be off guard.

It’s Bosco. “I still love you too. Always have.”

I want to call bullshit. I want to so bad. He didn’t come for us.

Then it hits me. The words she said. “He's the only reason you kept going?” I didn’t mean for the words to slip out of my mouth. Pain clutches my chest. My palm rubs a circle over it. As if I could soothe it. There is no soothing it.

Mom suddenly looks horrified. “That's not what I meant Elena.” She reaches for me but I back away.

“No I think it is.” All this time I was fighting for her. Thinking we were a team. Twenty years after he failed her and he still comes first. Did she only love me because I was a piece of him, the reminder she got to carry with her?

“Elena.” Bosco moves to come towards me. I can’t be touched. I don’t want comfort or apologies. The betrayal my heart feels is nearly sending me to my knees. I never had friends. I only ever had my mom. Guess I was wrong. She was only ever Bosco’s. Stupid.

“I need to go.” Circling in a wide arch around Bosco so he can’t grab me. I give her a kiss on the cheek. Her truth hurts. I’ll get over it. I’ve gotten good at hiding my feelings and building walls. Never thought I needed to build them from her.

“No. We need to talk about this. I didn't mean it.”

“It's okay mom. I still love you.” Mom relaxes into the bed. She must think I forgive her. That I’ve already forgotten the hurt. I move to the stairs. I have a clear exit to the door. I put one foot on the steps and turn to Bosco. “Take care of her.” Then I’m gone. Running up the stairs.

The house is quiet except for their yelling. I slam the door shut and lock it. It won’t stop them for long.

Mom is yelling for Bosco to stop me. I take a step back from the door. He slams against it. It rattles but doesn’t budge. It’s too secure to move.

“Elena.” He shouts. “Elena, open this door.” I don’t. I move farther away. “Elena, don't you dare leave. Your mother needs you!”

He keeps screaming. It disappears behind me as I race out the back door and down the lawn.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Luca

BOSCO PACES INhis office. Elena has been missing for two days and there are three Cartel bodies that have been found across the city. She's going to get herself killed. “What the hell is she thinking?” I am fuming. She left me. The hell-cat ran and I haven’t been able to find her. Not that I haven’t tried. I have all my men out searching and I have spent the last sixteen hours in a car driving around town aimlessly looking for any sign of her.

I have to hand it to her. She is good at disappearing when she wants to. It won’t stop me. I will find her and bring her to heel and accept my help. She has to know she isn’t alone anymore.

“She's thinking that her mother wants me more than her.” Says Bosco glumly.

“That’s ridiculous.” I scoff.

“I know that. Violet said some stuff in the heat of the moment that isn’t true. Elena didn’t take it well. She saw it as a betrayal. Now she’s hell-bent on finishing her revenge.” Bosco falls to his chair. His hands ringing his hair like he can pull the stress from its tips. “She's convinced I don't want her. That I already have a daughter and now that I have her mother back, that that’s it.” He leans back and lets his hands fall from his hair. I’ve never seen the boss look so defeated. “She thinks she lost her mother to me, and we don't have love for her too.”

“Why would she think that I thought she was close to her mom? What did her mom say that had her second guessing her?” Pipes in Massimo. He’s been by my side every minute since Elena ran out the back door. He hasn’t slept. He’s worried about her. He knows how much I have come to care about her. The bastard has hounded me about how I’m acting like a love sick puppy. He wouldn’t know how I feel. He wasn’t raised in a loving home like me. His heart isn’t frozen. It is missing. Gone. A black hole. I’d feel sorry for him, if it didn’t make him such an effective enforcer.

It’s funny how a girl who thinks she has no one and runs because of it, actually has an entire family behind her. The soldiers that have crossed paths with her admire and respect her. She leaves an impression on people. Me more than anyone. I love her strength and fire. I just want it beside me, not running from me. I swear the girl is giving me gray hair and we haven’t even married yet.

“Violet says they are, or were close.” Bosco looks lost as he tries to explain. “She didn’t mean it. Violet said I was the only reason she fought and ran all these years. Elena took it as her mom not doing it for her. I saw it in her eyes. The moment the words were out Elena broke. She thinks her mother doesn’t care for her.” Tears well in his eyes. The hardened Mafia Boss is crying. Fuck. I don’t blame him. This situation is fucked. What Violet said is fucked. “Elena doesn’t trust easy. We’ve all seen it firsthand. The only one she trusted was her mom. A split second was all it took to break it. My daughter didn’t deserve this shit life. Now she’s gone and I don’t know where she is or how to show her she can trust us.”

Massimo, who has remained mostly quiet the last few days, chimes in. “Even if we find her. How can we get her to stay? She is our heir. Her place is here. She doesn’t see it. How can she not see that we want her here?”

To my surprise it is Val that responds. “I think she does see it. I think it scared her.”

“Explain.” I ask.

He nods before continuing. “She told us she has been on the run since the day she was born. I imagine that doesn’t allow you to bond with anyone. Does she have any friends? I haven’t heard her talk about anyone. The only one I know of that she has talked to is that Luna person. And even she hasn’t spoken to her since the hospital incident.”

“I haven’t heard her talk to anyone outside this house since we got here.” I say recalling my observations with her.

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