Page 29 of Only to Save You

“Get on the bed,” she mumbles.

I lay on my stomach and she grabs a bottle of lotion from the nightstand. I am not really in the mood for a whole massage, but if Carter wants to give me one, I’m not going to say no. I want her to take her time with me. She squirts the lotion on my back and straddles my ass. I just want to shake my ass and rub against her core, but I restrain myself. She rubs circles along my shoulders, back, and lower back. It feels so good that I can feel myself yawning. I am exhausted from the emotions in therapy and the day I’ve had. But I don’t want her to put me to sleep, I want to connect with her.

“Mmm, I’m going to fall asleep, babe,” I grumble.

“That’s okay.”

“No.” I flip over, grabbing onto Carter’s waist to steady her against me. Now she is straddling my waist, and I can buck my hips into her.

“Oh.” She bites her lip and smirks at me. She leans down to kiss me, and I groan into her mouth. Nowthisis what I want. I wait for her to tug on my hair as her hands find their way into my hair but instead she holds them steady. So I wait for her to bite my neck or leave me hickies like she used to, but instead she doesn’t.

Carter kisses my neck lightly. She sucks on each breast like she’s afraid to tug or pull on them, and I clench my jaw. This is exactly what I didn’t want.

“You can be rougher,” I whisper. She nods but doesn’t change anything. Her hands are hovering over my body like she’s afraid of me, and I don’t know what the hell is happening anymore.

“Can we stop?” I ask, and Carter jumps off me like my body is on fire. Which I appreciate, but also feels like too much.

“Is something wrong?” Carter asks worriedly. She studies my face for a moment before sitting next to me on the bed.

“Yes. You.” I feel the tears building in my eyes, and I don’t know how to stop them from falling.

“W-what?” She looks at me, confused.

“I’m not going to break. I’m not fragile. I know I’m in therapy, and I know something big happened to us, but I need you to fuck me how you used to. I need you to touch me like you used to. I don’t want this to be one more thing thatheruined.” I start sobbing, and Carter pulls me into her arms.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispers in my ear.

“I know you’re trying to help. I know you’re looking out for me, but I need you to stop.”

“I just don’t want to be too rough or hurt you or trigger you in any way.”

“What? That’s what you’re afraid of?” I ask, wiping my eyes.

“Yes, I don’t want you to ever think of me and him in the same light and I was worried if I was too rough in bed, it might trigger you. I was just trying to be respectful.”

“I love you,” I whisper and lean in to kiss her. “Thank you.”

“I didn’t know you thought that I thought you were fragile. Babe, you’re one of the strongest people I know. There’s nothing wrong with you or us. We can go back to the way things were.” Carter smiles.

“You promise?”

“Baby girl, I’ll show you right now,” Carter says and pats the bed. “Lay down.”

“Oh, fuck yes.” I smile.

I lay down on the bed and she straddles me again, but this time every inch of her is in this moment. I know she’s not thinking about anything else besides me because I can feel it in her fingertips. Carter grabs my face, pulls it into hers, and our lips intertwine. She bites down on my bottom lip, pulling it toward her, and I moan lightly into her mouth.

“Fuck.” It is just rough enough to turn me the fuck on.

“Be a good girl and get the toy from the nightstand,” she commands.

“Yes, baby.” I nod and look through the array of toys she has in here. Then I pick up the bright pink strap on, it has become my favorite.

“You want me to fuck you?” She smiles, looking it over.

“Yes.” I hand it to her and she stands to put it on. Then she climbs into the bed, and I toss my panties at her. She laughs and throws them on the ground.

I lay with my ass in the air, my face in the pillows, and she stops at my entrance. First she runs her tongue up and down my slit. Let me tell you, someone eating you out from behind is one of the hottest things I’ve ever experienced. It’s like a whole new level of pussy eating that I’m a big fan of.

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