Page 21 of Gingerbread Hearts

“Thanks everyone,” Jake responds. I edge closer, eavesdropping on the conversation. There’s some more back and forth about the logistics of working in the city.

I’m about to leave the kitchen and introduce myself into the gathering when I hear Jake comment, “You know me, I’ll always be a bachelor. You can’t change the man, just the city.”

My heart drops. Time stands still.

There’s a lump in throat and at any given moment the tears will start to fall. My eyes already feel misty. My body’s immediate response, the mourning a relationship that never got off the ground. I need to leave. I look around and I’m still alone.

I head out through the other kitchen doors, grabbing my coat. I avoid Jake entirely, I don’t say goodbye, I just leave. It’s not a long walk to the bakery, not even a mile. The snow isn’t deep and my shoes can handle a little wetness. I decide to just make my way to the bakery first. Then I’ll go home. Maybe some cookie dough can help my wounded heart. And the coffee will warm me up.

I can’t believe I was willing to risk my heart.

My inner self practically screams inside my brain. I spend the quiet walk mulling everything over. The icy wind harsh against my cheeks, but helping me stay angry. Not letting the sadness seep its way to the surface quite yet. I need sweets, some time alone, and a good cry. I’m thankful when I see the neon sprinkles sign up ahead.

SIXTEEN

JAKE

I look around the room once more. It’s been a while since Violet excused herself. I figure she got caught talking to someone else, but I can’t see her anywhere in the crowded room and I’ve already walked through the area. Maybe it’s just poor timing and I’ve missed her. Or perhaps she’s in the bathroom.

After another bit of going through each room, lingering to see if she’d poke her head in any moment. I decide to give her a call from outside where it’s quiet just in case she had pockets in her dress and her phone on her.

I go to grab my coat before braving the cold and I notice that Violet’s coat isn’t hung up with mine. Odd, maybe she’s outside taking a break from the party. Maybe she left altogether.

But why would she leave? I ponder as I just stand by the front door.

“You know dearie,” I hear my grandmother’s voice from behind me. “It may be time to actually tell someone how you feel.”

Her face is stern, the type that you expect from any grandparent trying to pull the truth out of you. But I’m not ready.

“I don’t know what you mean, Grams.” I divert my gaze away from her.

“It’s pretty simple.” She takes my hand. “You’ve found someone to give your heart to, but she doesn’t know it. She doesn’t know how you feel about her, how you really care for her.”

Grams speaks the truth. I’ve been so focused on how becoming partner would change my world.

I want to share my life with Violet, but I’m hesitant. How will she fit in it? Will telling her how I feel only ruin these happy memories? I want to spend my future with Violet, not just waste my days going from one series of different rooms and lawyers to another.

“But,” my voice softens, “what if she doesn’t want it.”

Grams squeezes my hands. “But what if she does?”

Her words are exactly what I need to hear.

She continues, “I think you know where you need to be dearie.”

I nod swiftly, putting my coat on.

She looks over her shoulder, returning to her guests. “Let me know how it goes.” She smiles earnestly and gives me a little wave before heading back to the party.

Before I leave, I make my way to the kitchen, ignoring people’s conversations as I go. I look over the cookies left in the kitchen, finally finding one I want. Gingerbread, and sweets in general, used to be something I’d avoid. Nothing that I craved or went out of my way to eat.

I’ve gained a sweet tooth during the short time in Kastle Harbor. The little town and its quirks drawing me in. Violet pulling me into her world.

What this town means to Violet is clear.

And despite how briefly I’ve known her, I probably know a lot more about her than I know about anyone else in my life. In this brash decision, it’s like everything suddenly makes sense to me.

As I walk up to the bakery, I notice for the first time how soothing the glow from the neon cupcake sign is during this winter season. The little neon sprinkles are like tiny bits of joy against the white backdrop. Everything appears perfectly in place. The inside lights twinkle inside the bakery.

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