I surveyed the room, taking in each smiling face. It had been a nice evening. I had dinner with the entire family, including Julian, April’s fiancé. He popped the question a few nights ago. We were all thrilled.
Now, the five Bennet girls were in Nic’s and Lucy’s living room—sort of. Ruby was on video. Nic and Julian were in the kitchen making us drinks. Things were changing for the Bennets. As our family grew—with some of us starting our own units—maybe we wouldn’t be able to hang out as often as we once did. Lucy would soon have a newborn to focus on, as would I… I lifted a hand to rest it on my stomach but stopped myself.
I showed up tonight, because I knew I couldn’t wait any longer to share my secrets with my sisters. Plus, I’d already kept Damian waiting for almost two weeks. I looked at each of my sisters. I heard everything being said, but the lively conversations around me seemed distant and detached. I couldn't help but feel like an outsider, disconnected from the happiness and laughter they put out because I was terrified about how they might react to my news.
“I got a new roommate, and she’s awesome,” Ruby announced. Her grinning face lit up Lucy’s laptop screen.
“Another one? Gee Rubes, you have a new roommate every other week,” April noted.
“Yeah. What happened to… what’s her name again?” Tessa asked.
Ruby sighed. “The student life is financially rough, guys. Everyone who moves into this place finds it hard to manage their half of the rent after a while.”
Lucy, who had been watching me with a frown, glanced at Ruby. “Are you alright out there? Do you need money?”
That snapped me out of my brooding. I peered at Ruby. “If you need help, let us know,” I said.
While Ruby and I bickered at every turn, I loved the little brat to pieces. I worried about her being alone in Chicago.
“We can all pitch in,” Tessa said.
Ruby heaved another sigh. “Stop worrying. I’m fine. If at any time I need more money, I’ll just get another job.”
“Working full time while studying is tough. If you need help, just say so. Don’t be stubborn, Ruby,” April reprimanded.
“Yeah, that’s my job,” I grumbled.
Lucy’s lips lifted at the corners when her attention returned to me. “Damn right you’re stubborn,” she said.
“Pigheaded is the better term for Cass,” Ruby joked.
“Shut up,” I snapped.
Her teasing smirk made me roll my eyes.
“Finally, she’s back from her vortex of depression.”
I glowered so hard at Ruby it was a wonder the laptop didn’t catch fire.
“What?” She shrugged. “You’ve been sullen all evening. What’s eating at you?”
Tessa gave me a fleeting glance.
April gasped. “Tessa, what was that look? You know what’s going on with her, don’t you? Are you two keeping secrets now?”
“What? No! I don’t know anything.” Tessa pursed her lips and her cheeks reddened. The guilt was stamped on her face. My sister—bless her heart—couldn’t lie to save her life. It was one of her many endearing qualities.
“Liar,” Ruby accused. “She knows what’s up.”
Lucy gave me that penetrating stare that she reserved for mom mode. “Cass, honey, what’s been going on with you? I’ve barely seen you in weeks.
I stifled a groan when her eyebrows creased and her eyes became downcast. Then came the slight pout… We butted heads more than the others because we were so different and probably because she had to work harder to keep me in line over the years. However, that sad face was like my kryptonite. It always broke me down.
“I haven’t been… why would you think…?” Son of a bitch. She was spot on.
“Girls, she doesn’t want to talk right now,” Tessa said. “Let’s leave her alone and just enjoy the rest of the night.”
I gave her a grateful look for trying to rescue me, but it was the moment of truth. They all stared at me with so much worry that it added to my guilt. As if lying to them wasn’t enough, I was causing them stress too.