Page 33 of Playboy Billionaire's Secret Baby

Oh God, Adam just confirmed what I suspected. No one tells me that James couldn’t possibly be mine. No one says that I’m being crazy. They all agree with me a little. The chance that James is mine is growing by the minute.

“What do you think I should do?” I ask Adam. “I keep trying, but I can’t figure it out. I tried talking to my brothers, but they aren’t the best at giving advice… you know what they’re like.”

Adam chuckles. “Yeah, sure. I get it. Vincenzo is way too logical and black and white about things, and Elio has his head in the clouds. I get why they wouldn’t be the best advice givers. Plus, they don’t know Lexi, so they can’t give you true advice.”

“Yeah, that’s why I’m coming to you,” I inform him with a mirthless chuckle. “Because you are so much better at giving me rational advice. Plus, youdoknow Lexi and situation a little better. I’m hoping you can help me out with some practical advice because I don’t know what to do. I’m lost.”

Adam furrows his eyebrows as he thinks. I wait impatiently for him to figure out what I should do. It isn’t going to come fast, because I’ve been trying my hardest to work out the answer for a while now, and I have nothing.

“Have you tried talking to Lexi about it? Has she told you outright whether or not James is yours? Because without confirmation, what can you do?”

“I’ve been trying to call her, but she isn’t picking up,” I admit. “And I’ve sent a couple of messages as well. I don’t think she wants to talk to me. How can I ask her when she won’t even give me the time of day?”

I know why. It’s the way I approached her at the party. I was an asshole, no doubt about it. Especially when we’d just snuck off to have sex. I should have contained myself a bit, but I didn’t. I was horrible because of the intense shock, and now I can’t make it up to her. She’s doing everything she can to push me away.

“Have you tried going to see her face to face?” Adam asks. “Because anyone can ignore phone calls and text messages, but they can’t ignore you in person.”

“I have thought about it, but I don’t know if it’s the best plan. I mean, what if that pushes her away further because I am not respecting her boundaries or whatever…then she doesn’t ever give me an answer? I need to play this carefully.”

“Yeah, you might be right about that.” Adam’s lips turn down into a pensive frown. “But there has to be something you can do. If James really does belong to you, then don’t you have the right to know? What if we try and create a conducive environment for you both.”

“We?” I ask. “Who do you mean ‘we’?”

“Allegra and me. We will help you. If we’re all together in a kind environment, then maybe Lexi will tell you everything. That is, if she feels safe with us.”

“Now that isn’t the worst idea.” I tap my finger on my chin as if in deep thought. “We could make that work. But you don’t think it’ll end up freaking Lexi out? Like all of us against her.”

Adam shrugs. “Yeah, maybe, but I also think we need to try something. I don’t want you to have to live without knowing the truth. I really think you deserve this time as the potential father. How do you think you will feel either way? You have to have thoughts on it…”

“I really don’t know.” I’ve been thinking about it, but I can’t imagine how I’m going to feel when I know for sure. Whether James turns out to be mine or not, I can’t know now how I’m going to feel…not until the moment happens. There’s no telling how I will react. “But you’re right. I do need to find out one way or another. I can’t go on like this. I can’t do it.”

Adam nods in agreement. “Right, well Allegra and I will put our heads together and try and figure out the best way to proceed. We’ll make it work for both of you.”

“Yeah, okay.” I hope he’s right. I mean, having Adam and Allegra helping me has to be better than trying something on my own. “If you think that’ll work.”

He doesn’t know. I can see it written across his face. Adam has no idea if this is going to work, which only makes me more anxious. God, this is fucked up. My head falls into my hands as a strong sense of dismay overcomes me. If this doesn’t work, I don’t know what I’ll do. I’ll be hopeless. I won’t like that one bit.

Adam rests his hand on my shoulder, trying to comfort me without words. But all I can think about now is a blank emptiness inside my head, a blackness stretching out in front of me with no future. Long ago, I hadn’t thought of me and Lexi really being together and making it work, but now I can’t imagine anything but. Especially if the boy is mine.

“I think Marianne would have liked Lexi,” I mutter to Adam. “I know you didn’t know her or anything. You weren’t in my life when I was with her, but that’s one of the things that drew me to Lexi in the first place. The idea that Marianne would have liked her.”

“You think they would have been friends? You know, had the situation been different?”

“Yeah.” A warmth spreads through me as I imagine the two of them hanging out and getting along. I know others might find that strange, but I find it comforting. It’s almost as if Marianne is sending me these thoughts, reminding me that I should have another life after her. Because I haven’t been having much of a life lately. Not really. It’s been more just existing, keeping people at arm’s length, refusing to allow anyone to get close…

But now it’s time. Lexi has come into my life at the right moment, bringing the joy I didn’t know I could feel again. No wonder she got under my skin when no one else could. There really is something there between us.

“Well, that seems like a clear cut sign to me,” Adam declares smiling “Lexi seems to be the one for you. I really hope it all works out.”

“Mmm, me too.”

I can’t express how much I want this to work out. Now that I’ve expressed my feelings to Adam, and he’s suggested that Lexi and I really could make it work, Ineedto make it work. I have to make Lexi understand how much I need and want this…and how amazing it could be. If only I could make her see how wonderful our future could be together, I’m sure she’d be just as happy to give it a try… just as much as I am.

Chapter 23

Lexi

StillunsureofwhatI’m going to do, I’m grateful that Allegra called to meet me for drinks tonight. Mom seems pretty happy to leave the decision up to me, which is fine, I suppose, but it doesn’t make it any easier. I don’t know what to do either way. If I remain here in Italy, then I risk really having to talk to Frederico about things, which will change mine and James’s life forever… and I don’t know if in a good or bad way. If I go back home, I basically cut him off forever. In short, I lose the chance to make this right.

---