Page 17 of The Little Black Rose

“How are you feeling?” he asks as he pulls the door open and steps aside to let me enter first.

“Fine. Nervous,” I say when he falls back into step beside me as we approach the receptionist’s desk.

“Same,” he says with a soft chuckle.

After I get checked in, we find two empty chairs next to each other and sit down to wait. I feel like my bladder is about to explode, but the receptionist who scheduled this appointment told me to come in with a full one for the ultrasound. I cross my legs and squeeze my thighs together, unable to sit still as I squirm in my seat.

“Everything okay?” Zeke whispers.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Do you want me to find out where the restroom is?”

“No. I can’t go until after the ultrasound,” I explain.

“Ah, that’s right,” he says, nodding. “A full bladder works as a magnifying glass to see the baby.”

I look over at him, and he smiles. My own lips curve up, and I feel myself relax, relieving some of the pressure in my abdomen. Zeke’s been doing his homework, which, again, drives home the fact that I’m not alone in this. His presence isn’t just for show, or because he feels it’s the right thing to do. Hewantsto be here.

“Ava Brown?”

I look up to see a nurse standing in the open doorway that leads to the back. I push myself to my feet, and Zeke stands, too, holding out a hand for me to precede him.

“You can wait out here,” the nurse says to him as we approach. “I’m just stealing her to draw some blood, then she’ll be right back.”

Zeke looks over to meet my gaze. “Do you want me to go with you?”

I shake my head with a grateful smile. “Thanks, but I’m good. I’ll be right back.”

He nods and returns to his seat, and I follow the nurse back to a small room with a couple of straight-back chairs. I sit in the chair she points to, then wait as she preps a few vials.

“Normally, we’d collect a urine sample for a definitive pregnancy test first, but since you’re so far along, we’ll be skipping that step to keep your bladder full for the ultrasound. We’ll collect the sample after your appointment to test for protein levels and any bacteria that may cause a urinary tract infection.”

“Okay,” I say, stretching out my arm the way she indicates.

There’s a pinch when she inserts the needle, but she makes short work of filling the vials and removing it before placing a cotton ball over the site and securing it with a stretchy band. She leads me back to the door to the waiting room, and I see a look of relief flash across Zeke’s features when he catches sight of me.

That single moment warms my insides in a way I haven’t felt in a very long time. With my parents being gone for so long, Zoey and Sophie have pretty much been my only family. And as much as they love me, I’ve kind of established myself as the independent badass of the group. I don’t get mushy or needy, and have never expected them to worry about me. I take care of myself.

But this journey I’ve embarked on, bringing a new life into this world? I don’t want to do it alone. Sure, the girls would help, but it’s not the same as having an equal partner standing beside me. Someone with just as much skin in the game as me. Someone to worry about the same things I do. To celebrate the same wins. To obsess over all the same minute details.

To care about my well-being during something as simple as a blood draw.

“Everything go okay?” he asks as I retake my seat next to him.

“It was fine,” I say, offering him a small, grateful smile, which he returns.

We sit silently until another nurse appears in the doorway and calls my name. Taking a deep breath, I push myself to my feet. Zeke is up beside me in an instant, his hand pressed against my lower back in that same comforting way as before. The nurse smiles as we approach, then turns to lead us to an examination room.

After taking my temperature and blood pressure, she tells me to get undressed, lay on the table, and cover myself with the paper sheet folded atop it. As soon as the door closes behind her, I kick off my shoes. As I reach for the button on my jeans, I meet Zeke’s gaze and arch a brow.

“Oh, sorry,” he mumbles, then spins around to give me a modicum of privacy.

As I strip out of my clothes, I take a real look at my body. Would Zeke notice any changes since our night together? My belly is slightly more rounded and my boobs are a little swollen, but I doubt he even got a good enough look at me to notice the slight differences. It’s not like we languished in bed, exploring each other’s every bump and crevice.

No, it was a brief encounter against the cold wood of my front door. As soon as we finished, he ran out as if the hounds of hell were nipping at his heels.

I cannot forget that. I can’t allow myself to forget he regretted what we did the moment it was over, or that he never expected or wanted this surprise, lifelong commitment to me. And while I’ll never take his support for granted, I know I can’t expect anything more from him.

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