Page 1 of The Biggest Sacrifice

PROLOGUE - TOM

Imake my way up the walk to my brother's front door and knock. I’m nervous to tell him my news but I’m hoping he will be so busy and consumed with his new family that he won't think this is a reflection on him. Or try to fix it. Or give me shit.

This issomething I had to do for myself. I know my family didn’t understand the need I felt within myself to enlist in the US Marine Corps when I graduated High School. I know they’re proud of me, but their fear of what could happen was deafening and seemingly drowned out their support. They didn’t understand why I wanted to leave our small town, why I chose to put myself in danger.

They didn’t understandwhy I stayed past my mandatory four years and became a reservist. And they definitely don’t understand why I’ve continued to say yes when a call for service arrives.

So,when my commander contacted me that I was needed yet again, I said yes without discussing it with anyone. I didn’t need to see their disappointment and fear written across their faces.

Honestly,I don’t want to discuss it with anyone. I live my life alone and I make my decisions alone.

It wouldn’t befair to commit to someone when I know I’m always going to choose to leave, every time.

“Hey, Tom!”My new sister-in-law answers the door with one of the twins in her arms.

I adjustthe headband my niece is wearing, looking for the nickname scripted on the front, so that I know who’s who. ‘Cece’ reads across the front. I lean down and give her a kiss. “My favorite niecey, Cece.”

Chelsea tutsme and I look up and grin. “Where’s my favorite nephew and favorite Jelly-belly Elli?” She raises a brow and I step through the door.

“They’re with your favorite brother,”she giggles and leads me toward the kitchen where I see my brother holding Eliana while Dominic swings his legs off the island, eyes following every move the two of them make.

“Brother,you’re looking very domestic today.”

That Casanova smirkwe all carry makes an appearance. “I’m glad you noticed.”

I walk closer,give him a fist bump then give Eliana a kiss on the forehead. Turning, I grab Dominic and swing him off the counter while he squeals from his sudden liftoff. I hold him just a little tighter, for a moment longer than usual before placing him back down.

I look upand find Adam eyeing me. He nods to the back deck, and I nod back. Our silent conversation isn’t lost on Chelsea. “Adam, go put Elli in her crib. I’ll grab their bottles, it’s about time for a nap anyway.” I watch as the two move in tandem, brushing by each other like they can’t help but touch as they move about the kitchen. I wish I could have that. Correction, I do have that. I wish I couldallowmyself tokeepthat connection. To be able to focus on one relationship instead of always thinking about the ones that are no longer and what my next move is going to be.

Farrah could be that one.

Farrah deserves more.

Adam comes backaround the corner, moving with a mission to the slider doors that lead us out back. I follow, steadying my breathing as we go.

Of all my siblings,this will hurt him the most.

Adam pullsout a chair at the small table and moves around to sit in the one next to it. I feel his eyes on me as I lower myself to sit, avoiding his look. But like I’ve been taught to do, I harden my heart, steel my face and finally make eye contact with my oldest brother.

“You’re leaving again,aren’t you?”

I nod once.“I got a call last night. My old unit is being activated for a short stint. Security detail, it doesn’t sound too serious.” I shrug. I can’t give away information, but I can downplay the trip. “I’ve already spoken to Chief Hunter at the precinct. No problem there, they gave me leave and when I come back, I step right back in to where I was.”

“Don’t devalue this.I know what you’re doing.” He scrubs his face with his hands and leans back in the chair, letting out a loud breath, nothing but despair written all over his face. “I thought you were done, Tom. I thought that last time was it.”

“I can’t tellthem no if they call.”

“No,but you can get out. You can retire! You have a good gig here, bro. What more are you looking for?”

“Adam,that’s not how it works, you don’t understand.”

“Then make me understand,Tom! Help me here. Why do you need to do this? My kids are here. They need their uncle! We need our brother! How can you leave us so easily?”

Watching him,I don’t know how to explain that it’s a feeling deep down that I was born with. An innate need to protect those who can’t do it for themselves. A need to make things better, at least for the short time that I’m placed somewhere. To protect what could possibly become something worse from happening, down the line.

And the biggestreason of all: to try to make things right from my past failures.

“Adam,the same feeling you have to protect and control the family, is the same feeling I have. But mine is broader. Mine is for our country, not just here. If I can protect our country, then I can make it better for your kids, Adam.” When he just looks at me, I keep going. “Adam, if anyone threatened your family, what would you do?”

---