Page 73 of Payne's Envy

I cradled Joy against my chest as I stood and followed the rocky path. She stirred but didn’t wake as I trekked uphill. Within minutes, I spotted the waterfall and a large clearing beside it.

My father appeared like a ghost in front of me. He smiled and beckoned me into the unfolding memory.

Dad placed his finger to his lips as we hunkered down behind some bushes. We’d been there for hours, and my ass was numb.

I tore at a leaf and sighed. “How much longer do we wait?”

“Good things come to those who wait,” he said.

I groaned again, and that time, he looked my way. He chuckled, and I crossed my arms. He ruffled my hair as he spoke. “Hunting takes patience. You can spend an entire day waiting and nothing might not walk through your path.”

“Yes, I know. I’ve hunted and killed on my own. Why are you bringing me out here again like it’s my first time?” I knew how to take apart the rifle resting on my lap with my eyes closed. And could skin a deer or demon with a dull blade if I had to.

“Because you’re my son, and this is something I can teach you.”

I lifted my gaze to my father’s. He dropped his hand from my head and smiled again. “I wish I had the answers for you, Payne, because I know how it feels to be confused about yourself. I had my own war within myself long ago, too, you know.”

My stomach twisted, and I turned away from him. “Mom told you how Sebastian behaved the other day, didn’t she? Just say what you’re here to say.”

“You did nothing wrong.”

I faced him slowly, trying to decipher what that was about. Everyone seemed to think I behaved oddly around Joy, but Dad thought I did nothing bad?

“You know Fear and I used to be two separate entities,” Dad said.

I nodded.

“You know how hard we clashed when we became one, don’t you?”

I nodded again.

“You don’t understand how evil Fear was in the past. He did bad things, and he fed those memories to my thoughts constantly. To find peace in life, I had to embrace that Fear was part of me, but this….

Dad gripped his rifle and waved his other arm.

“This is still me. This is what I can give you. I want to teach you anything I can. I know you think your parents are crazy—”

“You guys are crazy,” I said. “As long as I can remember, you’ve been teaching me new ways to kill you.”

Dad laughed. “You need to know how to defend yourself.” His smile faded as he lightly squeezed my shoulder. “One day, we might learn more about what you are, son. If we never do, I won’t care. You are my child, and I love you no matter if you sprout antlers or turn ugly, short, and green.”

“Why would you say that?” I shouted as I felt my face heat. “What if you jinx me?”

“Would you relax?” He guffawed. “Why would you grow so tall only to shrink? Don’t worry, I’ll still love you.”

“Dad!” I fought my grin because he cackled like a hyena.

“That gun in your hands is me.” Dad killed the laughter again and then pointed at my back. “And that sword on your back, that’s your mother. These are pieces of us we’ve given you. I know it can’t replace what you don’t know, but I hope it means something to you, nonetheless.”

Dad had tears in his eyes as he turned his head. My throat felt like someone lodged a boulder in it.

“If I could, I’d give you the immortality that lives inside me. I don’t want it if it means existing without you and your mother.”

Something touched my face, and I startled out of the memory.

I looked down at Joy. She wiped my cheek and met my gaze. “Why are you crying?”

“Did I carry a sword and gun with me a lot?” I murmured. “In the past.”

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