Page 43 of Payne's Envy

Fat tears spilled onto my cheeks as I held the woman’s gaze. It was hard to remember the Payne that freely paid attention to me. I only remembered the man he became. The one that ran every time I came near.

“It’s hard to believe he loved me,” I admitted.

“Loves,” she corrected. “If you don’t believe me, then explain why you’re like him? Why he’s behaving like an ogre, trying to sling you over his shoulder, and take you away from here? It’s because he’s waited a long time.”

I shook my head. “That’s not Payne.”

“It is. Likely a part of him he’s kept hidden for so long. The part wanting to keep you.”

“Dad.” I pulled away from Melinda to face him. “What does she mean? You weren’t the reason Payne left the woods, right? He left because of me. Even now, I must be annoying him. So tell me you didn’t. You wouldn’t do that to him knowing how much I loved him.”

Dad hung his head.

Acid bubbled in my stomach and threatened to climb up my throat.

“You were covered in flames when Payne brought you home, Joy. Every time I stopped the fire, it started anew. It went on like that for days! When you finally stopped dying, you wouldn’t wake. You simply burned while in a coma. What did you want me to do? Despite your immortality, we could do nothing. I thought I’d watch you burn forever.”

“We?” My heart felt like someone had ripped it in two. “Mom knew?”

“We hid what happened from your siblings. Your mother knew, but not how. The only ones who knew the truth were Ryan and me. And of course, Payne.”

“Are you the reason I don’t remember?”

“No. Most likely that resulted from the trauma your body experienced.”

“How could you keep this from me? From all of us?”

I thought of all the hatred Payne received from my brothers because they thought Payne cared nothing for me. At least, not like I wanted him to. I imagined Payne all alone wherever he lived because of my dad. I remembered all the times I chased and all the times Payne ran. If he had strong feelings for me, having to push me away constantly when I came running… Oh, Hades. I had caused him so much suffering when he had been terrified of something awful happening to me.

“Payne didn’t want to hurt you again. We didn’t know what he did. So, he promised to search for answers. Once he was certain he would never harm you, I’d let him pursue you—"

“Stop talking.”

My head spun. Everything felt like a lie because nothing was as I knew it. All I’d ever wanted was Payne’s love. And I learned I might have always had it. He was my marked mate, but Payne wasn’t Payne. I grabbed my temples as the world tilted on its axis.

“Joy!” Dad reached out, but I yanked away before he could touch me.

“If this is true,youkept us apart. The angels separated you and mom for so long. How could you turn around and do the same thing to your daughter?”

Melinda and Dad flinched before he said, “Joy, you still got to see him. I didn’t keep you apart. I just wanted to protect you.”

“I never needed protection from him!”

Dad’s shoulders drooped. “I see my mistake now. I see what he did to make you like him, but I need you to understand how dangerous he could be when it came to you.”

“Joy!” Mom appeared right before my eyes. She pulled me into her arms, and there were so many tears. I couldn’t make out anything she said as she kissed my cheek. When she pulled back, she cupped my face. “How did you return home?”

“Dad, you weren’t going to tell us?” Kitty faded in with Maureen and Prudence.

I locked eyes with Prudence as she ran toward me. It was an odd thing. To see Prudence’s tears, and the relief softening her features. For so long, she refused to share herself with us…

Mom stepped aside as Prudence and Kitty attacked me on each side. Prudence’s grip on my shirt tightened as she dropped her head to my shoulder. “I failed you. He took you. I’m sorry—”

“Not another word.” I choked on my words as I hugged them. Through a hiccup, I said, “I’m glad you’re alive. I had to believe you were okay when he threw you.”

“I should have been with you guys.” Maureen covered her face as she spoke.

“You’re the eldest, Maureen.” Kitty pulled her in. “But it’s okay to cry with us. Jackal has softened your pride. It’s okay to falter.”