Page 88 of The Gilded Survivor

Something inside of me broke. If he knew about it, then… then…

My mind raced through an entire marathon and then short-circuited.

He had gotten me a gift. He had thought about me outside of these meetings and tried to deepen our relationship. What had he said in the note? A reward? Gifts were rare in Arrebol, and I seldom received them.

A sweet sounding melody filled my mind as I studied the young man meant to be my competitor. It had been so wholly unimaginable he would actually care about me past our warm-up banter. The flirting was a game.

When I looked at him now, it was as if I were viewing an entirely new person. A sarcastic, conniving individual with a tender side.

He took a deep breath and placed his hands on his hips. “Honestly Renata. I wanted to know that you are all right. You don’t have to stare at me.”

Warmth filled me from head to toe. When I met Magda, she seemed like the girl who would be at the top of an orphanage hierarchy, so I latched onto her. When she chose me back, we formed a bond that I still carried with me now.

Isaac was the closest thing I had to ‘familiar and comfortable’ in this world. He had helped me the day of the auditions, waited for me to go running with him nearly daily, and he seemed powerful enough to be a meritorious ally.

Maybe he could be more than an ally.

My inner polemicist said,But what about the times he was rude to you? When he said you might be Antonio’s next wife? He’s a player of games, and you can’t win.

My brows relaxed. Maybe he had been jealous when he said those things about Antonio and me.

I took a step forward.

I had wasted so much time worrying about my future, when the solution could’ve been standing in my face and laughing at my running pace. If I was going to form a bond, it was now or never.

It would be possible to dangle our love story in front of the public, and the Canciller’s committee would be even more inclined to approve.

“Renata?” he said somewhat uncertainly. “You’re alarming me. I don’t think you’ve blinked once in the last two minutes.”

I flexed my sweating hands.

I could love Isaac.

Probably.

If he loved me. If he respected me.

“Do you like being an Élite?” I asked, quirking my head to the side.

Isaac recoiled slightly, his eyes blinking too fast and his mouth twitching.

I mean, his reaction made sense. I was walking toward the line of treason by asking about such things.

“What kind of question is that?” he demanded. I watched him glance out of the corner of his eye.

I smiled, the sense of self-preservation appealed to me. This feeling was bubbling up inside of me, buoying me along the waves of self-confidence. “Do you like your life?” I took another step. And then another.

Isaac swallowed as I drew closer, looking at me like I was a knife aimed at his throat. Why that gave me more confidence, I would never know.

It wasn’t until there was no space between us that my eyes dropped from Isaac’s eyes to his mouth.

“No,” he said at last.

Honest.

Honesty and self-preservation. Things I valued beyond all else. Something inside of me broke open. I thought it could have been my heart.

He had sent me a gift. He wanted me to be close to him. We were alone in this large track, and he had made no move to put space between us.

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