Page 54 of The Caress

I’m not looking forward to any of the confrontations that are looming in my immediate future, but they’re all necessary. And honestly? They’re all long overdue.

Ella is waiting for me in the great hall when I get back to the castle. She’s changed her clothes and fixed her hair, but there’s no hiding the sad, knowing look in her eyes.

"Can we talk?" she asks as I start to walk past her. "Please, Keir?"

"No," I answer, heading straight for my office. I have to send her away, but I don’t know how. I’ve spent the entire car ride thinking about this exact moment, but I’m still at a loss for words. "I told you this morning that I don’t have anything to say to you. That hasn’t changed."

I step into my office and swing the door shut behind me, but she catches it and stands in the doorway. I can feel her watching me as I put away my briefcase and turn on my computer. If she thinks I’m going to forgive her, she’s wrong. If she thinks I’m going to tell her everything will be okay, she’s delusional.

"You’re really going to ignore me?" she asks. "Aren’t you at least a little curious to hear my side of the story?"

My eyes narrow as I look across the room at her. "Will it change the basic facts? Is your side of the story somehow wildly different from what I already know? From what you’ve already admitted out loud?" I can hear my voice rising, but I’m powerless to stop it. "Because unless you have some new information that completely contradicts what you said this morning, I don’t want to hear it."

"If I do give you more information, will you believe me?"

"Probably not." I shake my head. "But what do you expect? You’ve been caught in a lie, Ella. A big lie. A bad one. Did you really think I wouldn’t find out eventually?" I hold my hand up when she starts to answer. "Never mind. I don’t want to know. It doesn’t matter."

She’s starting to cry again, but how can I know that isn’t part of the act? How can I trust anything she says or does ever again?

I can’t. I won’t.

"You have to go," I say, steeling my heart against the sight of her tears. "You can’t stay here anymore."

"Where will I go?"

I shrug. "My guess would be New York, but it’s not really my concern anymore. As far away from me and my daughter as possible, if you’re asking what I’d prefer."

"Can I at least go say goodbye to Isla?"

Fuck.

Why am I starting to feel sorry for her? She lied to Isla, too, after all. Now that I know Ella’s true motives, I can’t risk letting her near my daughter again. She’ll probably just try to turn Isla against me.

"No. And don’t contact her after you leave here. I’m serious, Ella. I’ll take you to court and file charges against you if I have to."

It hurts to say those words, and I think it probably hurts her to hear them, but the time for being nice and understanding has passed. I loved her, and she betrayed me.

Now I have to cut her out of my life completely. I have to pretend like she doesn’t exist.

CHAPTERTWENTY-FIVE

ELLA

Saffron is waiting in her driveway when my taxi pulls up in front of her house. "I’m sorry for all of this," I say before I can even fully get out of the car. "I didn’t know who else to call."

"I’m glad you called me," she says, pulling me into a hug and helping me with my suitcase. "Do you want to talk about it now? Or do you want to rest and give me some more details later?"

"We can talk now," I say as she leads me into her thatched-roof house, which looks like something out of a fairytale. "Do you have some tea?"

"Of course." She pulls out a chair at the table for me and then quickly moves around the kitchen. "I always have tea. All day, every day."

She brings over two steaming cups and sits down next to me. "Now, have a sip, and tell me what my boneheaded brother has done this time."

I take a big drink and a deep breath, then launch into the whole, long, sordid story. I start with the first time I came to Scotland and end with the confrontation with my dad, only taking a few short breaks to dry a few fresh rounds of tears in between.

"Wow," is all she says for several long seconds when I’m finished. "I’ll be honest, that’s a lot crazier than I thought it would be. I assumed when you called that the two of you had just argued about… I don’t even know. Normal things?" She shakes her head. "There's nothing normal about anything you just told me, though."

"I know." I stare down into the bottom of my empty teacup. "I was so stupid. I've made my share of mistakes, and I’ll freely admit to them. But then Keir went and validated every single fear and bias I’ve had this entire time. It’s not like this is the first time he’s flown into a rage and sent me packing."

---