Page 83 of Shiver
“Always,” I swear. “There’s nowhere else I want to be.”
“You’re so sappy,” he teases.
Yes, I am. It’s gross.
“Wolf.”
He sighs deeply; the smile falling from his lips a bit. He turns to face his teammates filing out of the player entrance. They’re used to seeing me here now. I still get hard looks and some glares, but mostly, there’s suspicion and questions pointed my way.
By the way they watch us, I know he hasn’t told them about us yet. It makes me wonder why. He told me he wanted to weeks ago. Two months ago… in October? Has it been that long? And I already made it clear that it wasn’t an option that we keep our relationship secret. I wasn’t hiding.
“Yes?” Wolf asks patiently.
“Do I even need to ask if you’re coming out with us?” one of them asks.
“I am still technically failing all my classes,” Egon says. “I’ll happily show you my portal if you want to question it.”
“No,” the one who I’ve determined is Caulder says. “Last month… we believe you.”
Reminder of last month makes a pit form in my stomach. I swallow the sour taste.My fault.
Egon sighs. “Look. I need to fix this. I’m not exaggerating when I tell you that I spend every waking moment that’s not in class or hockey related studying and making up assignments. And now some extra credit work added on top of it. I have less than two weeks before finals. This is no longer an option. If I don’t pass, I lose everything.”
“And yourtutoris helping you again?” one of the others asks. He’s usually the guy glaring at me. I smirk in return when his narrowed eyes fall on me.
“Rake has put his entire life on hold to help me, yes,” Egon says. “Problem with that?”
There’s no answer. Egon nods. “I promise, after finals, we’ll celebrate whatever the fuck you want. Okay? But until then, my answer is just no. I need to fix everything I dropped the ball in. Which is my entire fucking academic career.”
“Go,” Caulder says. “Study hard.”
Egon smiles. He raises his hand in departure and realizes he’s still holding the flowers. Grinning, he tips them toward his teammates and turns to me, offering me his free hand.
I take his bag from his shoulder and he grins a little more. Swinging it over my messenger bag, I link our fingers together and lead him to the sidewalk. We walk in silence for a minute and I observe as he continues to grin at the flowers as we go.
“You haven’t told them,” I say when we’re rounding onto the walk leading up to my apartment.
He shrugs and shakes his head. “I feel like it’s going to require a longer conversation than ‘I’m with a man’ and I haven’t afforded anyone that kind of time right now. So, no, I haven’t.”
“You asked to weeks ago.”
Egon looks at me, smiling. Once again, I catch the slight blush on his cheeks. “I do still want to. I need them to know more than I’ve ever wanted to tell anyone anything. But like I said, they’re going to have questions and I don’t want to take the time to talk about it right now. I’m close to bringing up my grades, and I just don’t want to lose a minute. It might be that minute that makes me fail something. A fact that I don’t have time to learn. Something that I didn’t recite enough and I forget when I need it next.”
In front of my door, I cup his cheek and keep his gaze on mine. “Ten minutes isn’t going to break you, baby.”
“I know where they’re going. If you need me to tell them today, I will.”
I pull him to me and kiss him. “No. I just don’t want you to hide from them. Given what we’ve gone through over the last couple months, I think there’s a lot you haven’t told them that you want to. You don’t have to keep it quiet anymore.”
He smiles, letting his forehead fall to my shoulder. “I guess maybe I’m also a little nervous, so I’m avoiding it. I don’t know how they’ll react to me saying I’m sleeping with a man. That I’m in love with a man.” I hear him swallow. “I guess I’m just putting off facing that.”
“They’ve gotten used to seeing me there and you in my arms. They’ve seen us kiss. Today they saw that I gave you flowers.” He chuckles. “They know I’m pretty fucking possessive over you. And they watch us walk away holding hands every day. They already know. They’re just waiting for you to tell them.”
Egon nods. “Yeah, okay.”
“And you should also go out with them. They’re your teammates and friends. Iknowyou’ve not hung out with them in months.”
He huffs now. “It’s not like I was lying about studying.”
