Page 93 of Butterfly

“Because you coerced me,” I grit out.

“You knew what was happening.” Her fingers close around my arm. “Don’t give me that shit.”

“I was seventeen, and you took advantage of my age and inexperience.” I shrug my arm free.

“I don’t remember you complaining about the sex.” She takes my chin and stares into my eyes. “You know I like them young. But dammit, if you aren’t still attractive. I’ve neglected you for too long. Everything has a price, Alex.”

“No.” I stand up, my body shaking with anger. “No.” I close my fist. “Find someone else.”

She doesn’t flinch at my tone. “I’ll give you some time to reconsider.” She sprawls back on the sofa. “I suggest you think about it. You know where to find me.”

~ * ~

“THIS ISN’T THE type of offer you can turn down.” Vance’s eyes are glittering with too much enthusiasm after I told him about Rebecca’s proposal. “An Oscar-winning director, a best-selling novel, and the two hottest actors on the market. Not to mention that sex sells.” He clicks his tongue. “Nothing can go wrong. That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you for months.”

I’m sitting in his office, rubbing my forehead. “The script is essentially porn with torture and a paederast as the protagonist. It’sLolitameetsThe Hunger Games. There isn’t any happy ending or redemption, either. That’s not the image we promoted. That’s not the role I want.” I didn’t mean to talk about the script with Vance, but apparently my visit to Rebecca’s house didn’t go unnoticed. Rebecca called Vance and told him about her proposal. Vance called me, demanding a meeting. And now I’m confused.

“Don’t you get it? It’ll be all free publicity. Yes, people will be outraged, and they’ll talk about you. But that’s the point. If the film is well done, as I expect from a genius like Rebecca, it’ll be a success. Hell, it’ll be a success even if it’s not well done. It’ll make people talk. It’s not going to be any different from the sexy scenes you shot forPaladins of Shadows. And honestly, I can’t believe I’m having this conversation with you.” He shakes his head. “Since when have you become such a prude?”

I sigh and pinch the bridge of my nose. “I just want to do something different for once. Something that isn’t about sexy scenes. I want to prove I can do more. So far, I’ve starred in hot rom-coms and two adventure films with a tonne of sex. I’ve never been happy to stand naked in the middle of a crowded room. You know I want to get away from that type of work.” Am I wrong? Why can’t I challenge myself by doing different things?

“It’s because of her, isn’t it?” He leans back on the chair. “Sienna. She wouldn’t be happy to see you in a hot, sexy scene with someone else, and her reticence and jealousy are influencing your decisions.”

A groan rips out of me. “Hell, Vance, we’re together. Of course she influences my decisions. I have to take into consideration what she wants. It’s not only about me. We’re a couple.”

“This is dumb.” He smacks his hand over the desk. “Really dumb. It’s your career we’re talking about, and what is a sex scene compared to what you two have for real? If she doesn’t like it, then she doesn’t have to see it.” He spreads his arms, as if the solution is simple and logical. “It’s just acting. It’s all a pretence. And she’d better grow the hell up.”

A breath rushes out of me. Perhaps he’s right. If I do this, Sienna will be safe, and Emily will be off my back. But if I do this, I’ll have yet another sexy role in my résumé. Another role where acting isn’t important. Where my talent doesn’t matter.

~ * ~

MY HANDS ARE clammy once I tell Sienna what happened with Rebecca.

The more I think about my conversation with Rebecca, the more trapped I feel. Whatever I choose, Sienna and I are going to suffer or lose something.

I clench and unclench my fingers, waiting for her to say something. “This film isn’t what I want for my career,” I say again, leaving a ‘but’ hanging there. Whether we like it or not, we must deal with Rebecca’s proposal.

She’s curled up in a corner of my sofa, stroking Dart’s head as he’s sprawled on her lap. I know what she’s thinking. This is her worst fear. Our test. The event she dreaded from the beginning of our relationship. And dammit, I understand her fear…to an extent. She should trust us. She should trust me. We’re good together. Our love is stronger than her doubts.

I fight the urge to take her hand and prompt her for an answer. If there’s one thing I learned about her, it’s that she needs time to process her feelings. So, I sit next to her and hold my breath.

She scratches Dart’s ear, and he sighs. “If you accept, do you think Rebecca will expect you to have sex with her?”

“I don’t care,” I say without hesitation. “I won’t do it.”

“But what if she demands it?” She stops caressing Dart and shoots me an intense stare.

“I won’t do it,” I repeat through clenched teeth. I can’t completely remove the anger from my tone. “Have you learned anything about me?”

“Of course I have.” Her body shakes for a brief moment. “But one compromise leads to another. You start saying yes to something, and before you know it, you’re saying yes to a lot of things.”

“Dammit, Sienna!” I raise my voice.

Dart whips his head towards me, ears up. He’s looking at me as if saying ‘what’s wrong with you?’

Right. I take a deep breath. “I need you to trust me,” I say in a gentle tone. “If I’m going to do this—”

“So you want to?”

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