Page 137 of Beneath the Hood

I bite back a giggle, a little bit in awe of her fiery tongue.

The man doesn’t speak, just moves to the side and lets them push past, moving back before I can follow.

“Oh, I...” My knees tremble. “I’m here to see Jackson?” My voice rises like a question and I curse myself for sounding so unsure.

Strong, Blakely.

“Chase.” Jackson’s voice filters from the hallway and my breath sticks to my lungs.

I’ve been workingreallyhard the past month, learning every day to manage my panic, but right now, it’s a true testament to how far I’ve come. Because even though I feel the spiral forming like a funnel cloud, I don’t give in. I just close my eyes and count to three. Practice my PMR and ride the wave until it recedes.

“Is she okay?” someone whispers.

I hear shuffling and what sounds like the closing of a door, but I keep my eyes closed until I’m sure I’m in control. And when I finally open them, my gaze clashes with forest green.

“Jackson,” I breathe.

His nostrils flare. “Are you alright?”

A small smile creeps on my lips. “Yeah, I’m okay.”

He sighs, running a hand through his hair. My stomach winds tight like a screw.He looks so good.

“What are you doing here, Blakely?”

“I came to talk to you.”

He crosses his arms over his chest. “So talk.”

His demeanor is cold. Detached.

My throat is suddenly parched and I swallow, licking my lips. Jackson’s eyes drop to where my fists are curling at my sides.

“I’m not going to lose it, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

He shakes his head, his hair grazing his jaw. “That’s not what I’m worried about.”

“It isn’t?”

He groans, rubbing his hands over his face. “Blakely, please. Get to the point.”

My chest compresses. “Right, sorry. I uhh...” I scratch my cheek and then smile at him. “This is harder than I thought.”

“Can’t be any harder than going on camera and lying to the world.”

I flinch, his words like needles that pierce through my skin. “You’re right. You didn’t deserve that.” My throat clogs. “And that’s why I’m here, I guess. To explain.” I look at him through my lashes. “If you’re open to hearing it.”

He jerks his head in a sharp nod.

I breathe a sigh of relief. “My dad he—he saw the pictures of us and made me choose.”

His forehead creases. “Made you choosewhat?”

The words tumble out of me. “He was going to fire you, and all I could think was that you’d loseeverythingyou had worked for. All the years you’d been pouring into your dad’s dreams.” I snap my fingers. “Gone in a second. Because of me.” Regret sloshes inside of me. “So, I made a deal. I’d make sure we never spoke again as long as he kept you on.”

Jackson’s gaze narrows. “That wasn’t your choice to make.”

“And I knew you’d say that.” I smile, shaking my head. “I knew if I told you, then you would choose me.”

---