Page 34 of Heart of a Rebel

She tips her chin up and looks me in the eyes. This close I almost think I still see the flecks of gold in them. I can almost feel the garden that is her heart blooming.

But I have to ignore it because she’s right. We can’t do this.

“I’m sorry.” She frowns.

My hands beg me to reach out to her. To hold her. To take away whatever it is that’s weighing her down. But I resist. “Don’t be. You’re right.”

I’m not sure why she looks disappointed I said it, but her lips turn down the slightest.

“I want this for you, El.” I tuck my hands in my pockets so they don’t go rogue. “I want you to have everything you’ve ever dreamed. And I’ll do anything I can to make it happen.”

A promise I feel in my bones.

Because I want to kiss her.

Hold her.

Have her.

But I want more for her than to be selfish with any of those things.

Turning, I start to walk away, knowing the distance I need to create is much more than physical, but that this is where I need to start.

“Adrian,” she calls out, and I look at her over my shoulder. “Thank you for everything, and for not walking away. I—the band, needs you.”

“You’ve got me,” I say, leaving the room before she notices how much it hurts to say it.

Stepping outside, I clutch my pocket, where Sam’s dog tags sit, and I make myself a promise. If what Eloise needs is a friend, a band manager, I’ll be it. Nothing more, nothing less. I’ll be the person I never got to be for those I’ve lost.

No matter how much it hurts.

12

Eloise

Six Years Later

Closingmyeyes,Ibreathe in the crisp night air. The edge of summer has always been my favorite. The coldness of winter melting slowly from my bones. Add in an outdoor stadium and thousands of fans, and I almost feel my heartbeat again.

I open my eyes and look out at them.

Desperation.

Tears.

Devotion.

Stepping forward on the stage, I let myself soak it in. I do what I do best: I become Eloise Kane, Rock’s Princess. Strong and confident, powerful in ways that if they could look inside they’d know it’s a lie.

But in this moment with them, I feel a fragment of what they’ve seen in me for the past six years:Unstoppable.

My fingers are raw from playing my heart out tonight. The energy of the band pulses on the stage like it used to in the beginning.

It should be reassuring. After all, the guys are finally finding themselves on the other side of fame, and for the first time in a long time, I think we stand a chance in this world. Sebastian settling down with Cassie. Noah getting sober and finally convincing Merry to give them a chance. Even if Rome is still as reckless as ever, I should be comforted by the fact that the majority of the band is on my level for once.

So what’s this unsettling whisper coming from inside?

Their sense of peace only makes me feel more chaotic.

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