Page 17 of Brake's Intent

Brake moves in and swipes his tongue over each of my nipples before pulling away and reaching down to pick up the shirt I’d discarded earlier.

“Thank you.” I shrug the shirt on, though I don’t want to.

“Only reason you’re putting it on is ‘cause we’re eating and talking, Tink. It’s coming back off when we’re done,” Brake states, his voice stern but his eyes gentle.

I nod and swallow nervously, knowing the time to talk has come. Lawson told me they already knew about my engagement, but I know Brake. This whole mess I find myself in marked him. I’m sure of it. When he first saw me again, I could see the anger in him whenever our gazes met. It’s poured off him and washed over me, leaving me feeling guilt, far more than I’ve felt since the day I left him and Lawson. And I highly doubt that feeling has gone away for him.

The three of us eat in somewhat silence. It’s not uncomfortable, but I know what’s to come and it makes me want to scream at the top of my lungs because if I could, I’d go back and change the past. Make it so I don’t have to leave either of them. So I didn’t hurt Brake or Lawson.

Finishing with the pizza and wings, I turn to face both men on the bed. I clasp my hands together and look down at them in my lap while I wait for either of them to start. I honestly don’t know where they’d want me to start. They know about what happened when Shawna had me, so that’s one thing out of the way.

“Jax,” Lawson says and clears his throat, “I already talked to Faye yesterday.”

“Right,” Brake grumbles and gets off the bed, pacing alongside it. “I’ll just put it out there. Why didn’t you tell us you were engaged? Or better yet, explain to us why you had to leave.”

“I didn’t want to leave,” I whisper, lifting my gaze to his. “I didn’t want to give up what I wanted most. But I have no choice in this. I can’t dishonor my family. I’m to marry this man to keep the alliance strong.”

“Do you know who you’re marrying?” Lawson asks.

“Yes.” I nod. “His name is Gilroy Fitzpatrick. He’s to take over the position in California and is moving from Ireland to do so,” I inform them. “And before either of you ask, no, I haven’t met this man.”

“Don’t you have to be a virgin?” Brake demands, eyes narrowing. “Is that why you got with the both of us? Or were we a last fuckin’ hoorah?”

“Jax, I wasn’t a virgin when we all were together in Florida,” I remind him. “As for the whole virgin thing, yes, technically, I should have been, but every contract is different. According to my mother, when she explained it to me when I turned eighteen, the contracts depend on what my future husband wants. A woman who has her virtue. A woman who has experience. A woman who knows how to please. We’re to be taught for the future. Some want their women intact, but also want them to know how to pleasure.”

“So, they taught you how to fuck a man?”

The distaste in Brake’s voice is enough to make me feel less of myself.

“You can put it that way. My mother was responsible for ensuring I knew what was expected of me. Gilroy didn’t want a virgin, but he doesn’t want a woman who is loose either. Mother made sure I wasn’t. If not for my brother and Finn, I’d have gone insane. I do believe I have Finn’s wife, Olivia, to thank because if not for her I would never have been able to go to Florida in the first place.”

“What do you mean?” Lawson demands tersely.

“I can’t be a hundred percent sure, but I believe she spoke to both of them on my behalf after I told her I needed to be able to live. To feel free, because if I had to marry someone I knew nothing about, I’d end up falling down a rabbit hole and never come out.”

“You wanna elaborate on that?” Brake stops pacing and stands directly next to me.

Slowly, I look between each of them and close my eyes. “At the time, I was suffocating, and though my brother helped me where my parents were concerned and was able to make my going to school to be a nurse happen, I was still locked down tightly. I couldn’t do anything. I was being told how I was doing it wrong or what I needed to do to improve myself. I was already slipping into a dark place, and Olivia saw it. It’s why my brother and Finn gave me the chance to get away for a little while. But only on the terms that I marry and not do something stupid when I return.”

“You haven’t married him yet,” Lawson points out.

“I know. That’s because Finn asked me to do a favor of caring for Shawna,” I explain. “The wedding was to be after I returned home.”

“You’re not going back,” Jax declares no sooner than I finish.

“I have to,” I whisper, tears threatening to choke me.

“You don’t, and I’m not fuckin’ letting you,” he growls.

“Jax.”

“Don’t Jax me, Faye. I’m not about to get you back in my life just to lose you once a-fuckin’-gain. I’ll make sure you don’t marry the motherfucker.”

“How?” I feel my eyes widen as I stare at him like he’s grown two heads next to the one on his shoulders.

“By marrying you myself. Me and Lawson. You can marry us.”

“That’s not technically legal,” I blurt out. “And I couldn’t. I’d dishonor my family.”

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