Page 49 of Theirs to Crave

I stomped ahead, ignoring his muttering. I knew my brother. He couldn’t handle not having the last word. He’d be talking to me soon.

He lasted half an hour. He hung back during the walk and was sullen and withdrawn when we took a break. We were continuing our trek when he stopped me, his hand on my arm.

I raised an eyebrow at him coolly.

“Don’t bust my balls, hermana.”

I snorted, but waved the others on, walking beside him until there was enough distance for a quiet conversation. Tension radiated from Mariano, and I bit back the questions I wanted to ask. This would go better if he started it.

“Lo siento.”

The words were so quiet, I thought I’d imagined them at first. “Qué?”

“Fallé. Lo siento mucho.” My brother turned his head, but not before I saw the tears falling down his cheeks. He pushed his hands up his face, wiping them away, and gripped his hair in both fists. Still in Spanish, he choked out, “This is all my fault.”

I grabbed his arms, prying his fingers loose before he snatched himself bald. “¡No mames! ¿De qué hablas? Look at me, Mariano.”

He refused, squeezing his eyes shut with his head twisted away.

“Mariano Julian Alfonso Parker, if you don’t tell me what’s going on in that big stupid head of yours, I’m going to pee on you while you sleep.”

His nostrils flared, but he kept his teeth stubbornly clenched.

“Every night, asshole.” I pinched the back of his bicep, twisting until he yelped. We glared at each other, and I didn’t back down. “Háblame.”

He dropped his gaze, but finally the words came out. “I promised to get us out. To get us home.” He’d started slow, the words dragging out of him, but they sped with his breathing until they blended together. “I failed. Now we’re never going to go back. We’re never—you’ll never—” He snapped his mouth shut, grimacing as if the words he didn’t say were bitter on his tongue.

Madre de Dios, save me from macho idiots.

“Are we in a cage, hermano?” I paused long enough for him to open his mouth, then continued, louder. “Do you see a cage anywhere? No, you do not. Why is that?” I pretended to think about it, then widened my eyes and filled my voice with saccharine amazement. “Ay, it’s because we’re free!As you promised.”

He turned his back on me, and I threw my arms up in frustration. “What else could you have done? Single handedly hijacked thespaceship? Flown us back to Earth? Did you get yourspaceship flying licenseand not tell me about it?!”

“I’m supposed to protect you!” he shouted, getting in my face. His chest was heaving, and his eyes...his eyes were full of torment that had had years to grow.

My heart cracked. I didn’t let it show, though, as I pushed back into his space, poking him. “You don’t get to do that. It’s not your fault shit happens. Not your fault we were abducted. Not your fault I married an asshole. You’re not fucking God.”

“Ayyyy. . .” he muttered, lip curling.

“Fuck you,” I spat. “You could have died. Almost did—protecting me. We’re supposed to take care ofeach other, cabrón. I don’t need you to rescue me like a fucking princess in a tower. I need you to be here with me.”

I was breathing hard now, tears I refused to spill burning behind my eyes. “This shit—all of it—I can’t even wrap my head around it most of the time. We’ve lost everything. I can’t lose you too.”

My face was suddenly smooshed into his chest. I wrinkled my nose at the sweaty brother cooties, but my arms were just as tight around him as his were around me.

“I’m sorry.” Mariano mumbled into my hair. Then he dragged in a breath. “You don’t think I could’ve—”

“No!” I kicked him in the shin. Ow. I needed to get some shoes. “You did everything you could. I’m proud of you. Mamá would be proud of you.”

His heart was racing as he squeezed me tight, and I coughed.

“Now get off me, fool. You need a shower—yesterday.”

He twisted, laughing like an idiot as he tried to push my face into his armpit.

I gagged, loudly and with much drama, as I pushed him away. We bickered and teased as we worked to catch up with the others, and I’d never been so happy to be annoyed by my own brother.

I caught the glint of Revik’s pale eyes in the trees as we walked—he’d stayed back during my little “intervention” with Mariano—and the look in them made me stumble.

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