Page 19 of Just Another Chance

I even recall what Chella said before she threw herself at me:“I’m sorry.”

At the time, I had no idea what she was talking about or why she’d apologized. She clearly knew what she was about to do and the consequences of her actions because she sure disappeared fast enough. And when Thomas offered her money, she must not have felt guilty about taking it and had no issues cashing his goddamn check.

And Addie and I were left standing there, the pieces of our relationship laying at our feet, broken and shattered because of the actions of two selfish, fucking assholes.

My father was the most controlling man I’d ever met and if that letter was supposed to be a sincere apology, he came up short.

“I don’t accept your half-ass apology,” I announce to the empty room, my words slurring slightly. “Do you hear me, Dad? What you did is unforgivable.” After all he’s done, I hope he is rotting in hell.

I’ll never forgive him for setting me up like that.Never.

Agreeing to that dinner with the vain hope of satisfying my father for once in his life is the biggest regret of my life. I wish I could go back and re-do that whole day two years ago. I would’ve told him to go screw.

Why was there some innate part of me that felt the need to please him so badly?

My dad disappointed me all of my life, so why was I always wanting to make sure I didn’t displease him? When I should’ve told him to fuck off, I agreed to his demands.

Maybe that’s what children do, though. They desperately seek their parents’ approval, no matter how terribly they’ve been treated. I pinch the bridge of my nose and still hate myself for going along with what he wanted.

If I had been stronger and more vocal, it never would’ve happened. Addie and I would still be together, married and happy. Maybe even with a baby. I suck in a breath and imagine what that would be like.

Christ, I’d be the happiest man in the world.

But there’s no chance of a happy ending for me anymore. The day Addie left, my world turned dark and cold. I just sort of turned off. Now I’m stuck in this limbo, and I don’t think anything can save me.

And the craziest thing about the entire situation is I don’t care. My capacity to care disappeared the day Addie took off. I might have decided to move back to the city, but the only reason is to be closer to Nash and the rest of my family. I guess I find a little joy making furniture, so I’ll probably keep woodworking. And I promised to help out with Beckett Technology.

When it comes to love and relationships, though, that’s nothing but a dead-end for me. I don’t plan on dating or putting myself out there again. I’ll work and hang out with my siblings and continue to pleasure myself when the urge arises.

Jesus.What a pathetic and lonely fucking future.

Maybe I’ll be lucky and drop dead early of a heart attack.

Just like good old Daddy.

9

ADDIE

It’s strange being back home in South Grove, but in my gut, I know it was the right decision. I’m going to stay at our family home while I try to sort through the mess and figure out a game plan moving forward.

First things first, though. It’s imperative that I find a job. I’ve always pretty much lived paycheck to paycheck, but I do have a little bit of savings. I don’t want to dip into it, though, and that’s why I decide to go downtown and scope out the flower shops. Maybe I’ll get lucky and get hired on the spot.

I choose a busy area in Manhattan, park my car on the nearby side street, and strap Owen in his stroller. Then I push him while checking out various flower shop addresses on my phone. There are quite a few in the area and most sound pretty upscale. I really enjoy working with high-end flowers and creating beautiful arrangements. In the back of my head, I would still love to open my own shop one day, but I could never be able to afford one with a prime location here downtown. South Grove will have to work.

Again, one day. If I’m very lucky.

Luck must be on my side because the first shop I walk into, the owner is there working, and we immediately hit it off. I mention my experience, how I just moved home and that I’m looking for a job.

“Your timing couldn’t be more perfect,” Heather says, looking a little flustered. “I need to hire a new full-time employee because my last girl just left.”

“Really? Well, I’m very interested,” I tell her. “I even have my resume.” Leaning over, I dig around in the back of the stroller and pull out the folder which holds my updated resume.

Meanwhile, Heather leans down and starts talking to Owen. “He’s so very handsome,” she says. Owen laughs and Heather chuckles. “Quite the charmer, aren’t you?”

“He really is,” I say, standing back up.

“What’s his name?”

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