Page 43 of All It Takes

“You wouldn’t mean to, but that doesn’t mean you wouldn’t,” Chase said bluntly.

ChapterTwenty-Nine

TIFFANY

I twisted my hands together in my lap. I was over at my dad’s, having dinner. Chase was stopping by to pick something up. I’d promised myself I would finally tell my dad and Chase about my surgery.

Because I was me, and whenever I got nervous, I tended to blurt things out, so I decided I was going to tell my dad first. Right this minute.

“Before I moved home last year, I thought I had cancer.”

My dad had just closed the oven and turned around, oven mitt still in hand as he stared at me. “What? Are you okay? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Dad, it wasn’t cancer. I’m fine.”

He held my gaze for a long moment before carefully setting the oven mitt on the counter and walking over to the table to sit across from me. “What happened?” he asked.

I looked over at my father, the man who had been the mainstay in my life. My throat tightened as I recalled the times I’d wished my mother hadn’t wanted to drag me with her when she chased after the latest something. Nothing ever panned out for her, or at least that was how it felt. She was always chasing something. She craved attention. She wasn’t cut out to be a mother, but she’d focused on me more than Chase. It felt sort of good when we were younger, but it was mostly confusing because I never really felt good when I was with her.

I was an afterthought, something sort of annoying. She never liked being alone, so she brought me with her. When the child she’d dragged along with her was inconvenient, she would plunk me off to the side and ignore me.

My dad put a stop to it when I was about eleven years old. I would learn years later that it was after she had one of her two affairs. She’d left me alone in a hotel room for the night, and the owners had called my dad. To this day, I didn’t think Chase knew that detail. I didn’t even piece it together until I was older.

My dad’s kind eyes waited, and my next question surprised me. “Why did you stay with her?”

Our family had been through some upheaval in the past few years with Chase discovering by chance that our father wasn’t his biological father. Our mom had been with someone else when she was first dating our dad. That man was Chase’s father, biologically speaking. He’d passed away before Chase knew about him.

My father had taken the news in stride and even explained it hadn’t surprised him. I had initially been more invested than Chase in making those new connections. I suppose because I craved connections desperately and wanted a sense of family.

My dad studied me for a moment before nodding, as if to himself. “Because I worried if I divorced her, you and Chase might become pawns in a game for her. In hindsight, I realize I made more mistakes with you. I should’ve put my foot down sooner and told her she couldn’t keep taking you with her. I’m sorry for that.”

Tears stung in my eyes, but I was determined not to cry. I swallowed through the achy feeling in my throat as that confusing sadness washed through me. It was a familiar feeling, one tied to my mother when she was alive. Its edges had softened after she passed away.

“It’s okay,” I said softly as I reached over and patted my father’s hand as if I was trying to comfort him. “You put a stop to it.”

My father nodded. “Eventually. I didn’t see your mother clearly at first. When you and Chase were little, it was different. Or maybe I should say she really tried at first. I thought I could just handle all of it. Honestly, I suppose when you were younger, I thought maybe she would leave. I didn’t realize she saw me as her only source of financial stability so she stayed. When I think back, I wish I knew what I could’ve changed. But even now, I don’t. She was your mother and…” His words trailed off, and he shrugged, the regret and sadness in his gaze twisting an old knife in my heart.

“It’s okay, Dad. I don’t know what you could’ve changed either.”

“Are you going to tell me about your cancer that wasn’t cancer?” he asked gently.

I took a deep breath before letting it out and nodded. “Short version. I was having sharp pains in my back, really sharp. I went to the doctor. I panicked because they ordered an MRI and said I had a tumor. They told me I had to have a biopsy and sent me to the oncology unit to get it done because it could’ve been malignant. It wasn’t. I was so freaked out and didn’t want to freak you guys out. I just ended up not saying anything, and I don’t really know why.”

I didn’t want to share how the guy who I’d let into my heart had let me down completely.

“Do you still have a tumor?” my dad pressed.

I shook my head quickly. “I had outpatient surgery. When they realized it was benign, they scheduled an outpatient procedure. It didn’t affect my movement. It was as simple as a cyst, but it was on my spine and kind of scary at first.”

My dad was saying, “I wish you would’ve told us,” just as Chase came walking in the kitchen from the garage.

“Told us what?” he prompted.

Chase read the room quickly, picking up on the fact that we were having a serious conversation. His eyes landed on me. “What happened?” He had his keys in his hand and pocketed them as he stopped beside the kitchen table, looking back and forth between us.

“I had a benign tumor on my spine. It’s fine. I had surgery to remove it a few months before moving home.”

“What?” My brother’s tone was sharp.

---