Page 20 of Love Rescheduled

As if someone were following me, I sped up my pace. I felt so on display. It kept the Josh hate burning. He had more than humiliated me. He was upending my life. And for what? Because I stole everything from him. Oh, that pricked my heart. If he only knew how much it hurt me to have done so. How much I loved him and haven’t felt the same since we’ve been apart. But he could never know those things. Didn’t he see how incompatible we were?

I shoved my chilly hands in my jacket pockets and hustled to the park. I had this need to pull my jacket hood over my head and hide, but I desperately didn’t want to be that woman. How was I going to find love if I was hiding? I had survived the airport, and I was sure there were a couple of women who had pointed at me and murmured between themselves, probably about the video. I had almost left the gate to go rent a car and drive home, but I feared getting on some TSA watchlist. I survived it, just like I had every other embarrassment in my life. Alec always loved to point that out. He also loved to say, “Why are you giving strangers a say in how you feel about yourself?” Was that poignant? Sure. But putting it into practice was entirely different. Probably because the people who should have loved me mocked me the most growing up.

Sometimes I wondered if my parents were out there ridiculing me now. I hadn’t talked to them since Nana died. My therapist helped me to see those were relationships that deserved endings with big fat periods that I should never erase. Especially after the vitriol they tossed my way when they learned Nana had left me all that she owned. That was a terrible time. Josh wasn’t the only one who lost everything. Though I would never claim a complete loss. I still had Jolene and Tara. I had gained Hal and Stu. I supposed I better throw Alec in there, too.

For those who had stood by me, and for myself, I didn’t cover my head. If worse came to worst, I would let Tara unleash some names to take off the heat. She was itching to anyway.

By the time I made it to the park, I was feeling pretty toasty, considering it was only in the forties. The fear of exposure really does something for your pace.

Hal and Stu were already there, eyes set at the entrance. As soon as they saw me, they jumped up. Well, jump is an exaggeration, but they moved faster than I had ever witnessed. Immediately, I worried something was wrong. Normally, they arrived after I’d started my way around the path. Then they took a seat to rest from the walk over.

I picked up the pace even more and met them. “Is everything okay?”

“Just fine, darlin’.” Stu cleared his throat.

“How are you?” Hal asked with meaning.

I narrowed my eyes at them, ready to dig deeper, but then it dawned on me … “You heard about the video, didn’t you?”

Stu gave me an uneasy smile. “Well … you see … my granddaughter might have mentioned something when she dropped by yesterday.”

I hung my head and sighed. If my favorite social media-hating old men had heard about it, I was for sure moving out of the country. Maybe to a remote village without the internet. But then I could never secretly watch The Bachelorette again. That probably wasn’t such a bad thing. That said, a place with no internet probably didn’t have all the comforts of life I enjoyed, and I wouldn’t be able to work. Ugh. I hated Josh.

“So that’s Josh?” Stu laughed.

My head snapped up. “Yeah, that’s him,” I grumbled.

Hal chuckled. “Man must still have a thing for you. Should we put him on our list to interview?”

“No,” I was quick to say. “He’s actually at my house now.”

Both of their brows flew to the sky.

“It’s not what you think. After my walk, I plan to kick him out. Forever.” That hurt to say, but it had to be said. I could not have a life of being in the spotlight. Especially when it wasn’t all that flattering on me.

“Why did he come?” Hal asked.

“I’m not exactly sure. Something about unfinished business.”

Stu pressed his lips together, trying not to smile. “Unfinished business, huh? Sounds kind of serious.”

Hal looked to Stu, nodding. “Very serious.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “I assure you, it’s not. Besides, he disgraced me in public.”

“Hmm,” Hal said. “That we can’t have.”

“Should we come over and rough him up?” Stu asked.

I giggled. “I don’t think that will be necessary.”

Hal patted my cheek. “Are you okay, honey?”

I leaned into the affection. It was something Nana used to do. I missed her. Even though I had a feeling she would be thrilled Josh had shown up and would probably tell me not to kick him out. She used to say, “That boy is good for you.” In many ways it was true, but how was this exposure good for me? “I’m working on it.”

“Well good, because we have another man for you.” Stu rubbed his hands together, showing he was getting down to business.

I bit my lip. “You do?”