Page 65 of Beautiful Crazy

I don’t want a sweaty taint if Emily and I are going to fool around at all.

Though maybe she really wants to go to sleep.

“Okay. Why don’t you get yours and then I’ll hop in and get mine? I can’t possibly smell that great after sweating on that dance floor.”

She reaches up on her tiptoes and kisses my cheek. “I think you smell great. You always smell great.” She starts down the hallway and then turns with her finger up in the air. “Ooh except after cardio day at the gym. You don’t always smell so lickable then.” She winks and then retreats into her room to grab her things before heading into the bathroom.

I take some time to play with Lola and spoil her with treats until it’s my turn for the shower. Standing under the hot water, my mind is running the gamut thinking about what I should do when I’m done.

Do I go back to my room?

Do I just go to sleep?

Will Emily be asleep?

I should’ve had her shower after me.

If she’s still awake, do I kiss her?

Literally sweep her off her feet?

Does she want that?

I mean I know she wants that but is it too soon?

I mean we’ve been best friends for years. It can’t be too soon, right?

Fuck.

I don’t know what to do.

I turn the nozzle to the shower off and dry myself with my towel and then wrap it round my waist. Realizing I didn’t bring clean clothes in here to change into, I resign myself to simply stepping out in my towel, nearly breaking rule number six. If Emily is awake and likes what she sees, we’ll go from there. If not, then I guess I’ll go to bed a happy, albeit slightly frustrated, dude.

I quietly open the bathroom door and turn off the light behind me to a quiet and darkened apartment. Even Lola is nowhere to be found.

Dammit.

She’s gone to bed.

After such an amazing night, the last thing I want to do is go to bed alone, but if she’s asleep already, I don’t want to wake her.

Maybe she’s just not ready.

Disappointed, I sulk back to my room and throw myself on my bed, staring up at the ceiling.

I really thought tonight was the night.

“She’s into me, right?” I whisper to myself. “I’m not imagining it. She was definitely flirting with me tonight.”

I replay the night through my head focusing in on the nuances of her facial expressions and body language throughout the night and I’m at a complete loss as to what to do.

If she’s scared to move forward, then I should end this right now. I don’t want to pressure my best friend into being with me no matter how badly I might want her.

But on the other hand, what if she wants this and is merely too scared to make the first move? What if I help her along? What if I sneak into her room and cuddle with her?

It’s a start.

And it means not having to sleep alone tonight.

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