Page 88 of The Confidant
But she shook her head and said, “It would be nice to have the company.” She bit her lip and seemed to search my eyes. “Nice to talk to you again.”
And even though she was only talking about taking a simple car ride together, my heart was racing at the thought of finally being alone with her again.
To finally have the chance to clear the air and get one step closer to friendship again.
“That would actually be great.” I cleared my throat. “Let me just tell my parents.”
She nodded and waited for me as I told my parents about the change of plans. After hugging my parents goodbye, I put the duffel bag with my basketball stuff in the trunk of the white Lexus Scarlett’s mom had bought her for her eighteenth birthday and climbed in the passenger side.
“Thanks again for coming to the game today,” I said as Scarlett drove us toward the parking garage’s exit. “I know you had other things going on, so it means a lot that you made time to come.”
“Of course.” She glanced at me, the overhead lights scanning across her face as we drove. “I’m glad you reminded me about it. I would have regretted missing it.”
She pulled onto the main road that would lead us out of Uncasville and toward Eden Falls. When “Paper Hearts” by The Vamps started playing through her car speakers, I had to turn it up because it was one of my favorite songs.
“You like this song, too?” I asked.
“Yeah,” she said.
“How did you hear about it?” I asked, surprised that she had it on her phone since The Vamps were a British pop band and I hadn’t heard of any of my friends listening to their music.
“It was on that playlist you shared with me last year.”
Oh.
I’d forgotten I’d shared my “Scarlett and Hunter”playlist with her when we’d started dating—the playlist I’d been compiling since sophomore year when I was trying to get up the nerve to tell her how I felt.
Man, I’d had a crush on Scarlett for so long. And that playlist was probably over a hundred fifty songs long by now because I was still adding new songs to it when they made me think of her.
“Do you listen to that playlist very often?” I asked, curious how much insight she had into my feelings for her.
“Sometimes…” She sighed and tapped her thumbs on the steering wheel before glancing back at me. “I like to check in on it every once in a while to see if you’ve added anything new.”
Did that mean that she’d seen the songs I’d added after she told me we couldn’t ever be more than friends? The angsty songs like “True Crime” by Taylor Acorn that talked about a girl who’d imagined spending her life with the guy she was dating, only to have the rug pulled out from under them.
Or had she seen “traitor”by Olivia Rodrigo, which didn’t actually speak directly to my feelings toward Scarlett at all but had simply been added because there were two lines in the chorus that talked about feeling betrayed and how the betrayer would never feel sorry for what they did.
Those particular lyrics actually fit my feelings toward The Fold more than anything since it was the real villain in mine and Scarlett’s story. The villain that never apologized for any of the damage it caused even when it was proven to be wrong.
“Does it bother you that I still listen to the playlist?” Scarlett asked in a quiet voice when I didn’t say anything. “Because if you want me to stop listening to it, I can. I just like to see where your head is…”
Why did I like hearing that so much?
Probably because it showed that even though she couldn’t see a way to be with me, she still cared.
Scarlett still cares about me.
“No, it’s fine.” I cleared my throat because it was suddenly froggy. “I mean, I don’t mind if you keep listening.”
Speaking my feelings had never been my strong suit, so this would actually be a much easier way for me to communicate things with her.
Music always captured things like that so well.
The song ended, and when another song from the playlist began, I asked, “Are we listening to that playlist then?”
She bit her lip and seemed embarrassed when she said, “I’ve been listening to it a lot this week.”
“You have?” My arms and legs tingled at the thought that she’d been missing me as much as I’d missed her.
