Page 98 of Carnal

When I close my eyes at night, I see my future with him. It scares me more than anything. I wish I could get past the “working for Dante” issue. It would be a lot easier to let the world know we're together. I know my pride's in the way. Yet, I can't figure out how to not care about Dante's thoughts and how he'll treat me at work if he ever finds out.

The anxiety of keeping Tristano and me a secret isn't fun, either. Whenever Tristano comes into the office, I stress over whether I'm acting like my pre-Tristano self toward him or not.

Upset, I decide to clean up the kitchen and go to bed. I'm no longer hungry and I'm also mad at myself. I never throw food away. It's a cardinal sin since I grew up hungry all the time.

I curl up in my bed, feeling exhausted but unable to sleep. Throughout the night and into the morning, I check my phone for a message from Tristano. It never comes, and at four thirty, I text him.

Me:I'm sorry. I hope things went well for you last night.

He doesn't reply. The message says delivered, making my thoughts spiral out of control again. Some of the subs he used to have sessions with pop into my brain, and I cringe.

Since I can't sleep, I shower, grab a yogurt, and head to the office. I take my usual spot in the conference room and spread my files all over the table. I get lost in my work for hours.

The other staff members arrive around nine. I clean up the space and go into my personal office. My intercom buzzes.

"Pina, you have a delivery," Megan, our newest receptionist, states.

"What is it?" I ask, racking my brain over what I could have ordered.

"I think you need to come out here to find out," she chirps.

I turn the speaker off and groan. Megan is super dramatic. Everything is always a big deal. However, she's proved herself worthy over the last few months, so I've kept her on board.

I trudge out toward the lobby. When I turn the corner, I freeze.

The largest bouquet of roses I've ever seen sits on Megan's desk. Since they take up so much space. I can't even see her face. They're red, and while some people put no thought into the color of roses, I know what every color represents. Red signals romance, love, beauty, and courage.

My pulse pounds harder, and a grin I can't control forms on my face. I ask, "Are these for me?"

Megan rises, wiggling her eyebrows and dangling a tiny envelope in front of me.

I snatch the envelope out of her hand and am relieved to find out she didn't open it. I pick up the vase and take everything to my office. I open the card, and my heart skips a beat.

Pina,

I'm sorry I ruined your dinner. If it means anything, it smelled really good before you tossed it down the sink. (That's supposed to make you laugh, so don't hate me more.)

Let's have a do-over, but I'll do the cooking. Meet me in Manhattan at eight.

Love,

You Know Who

P.S. - Yes, I know what red roses stand for.

My butterflies go crazy.I smile so big, my cheeks hurt. Does he really mean it? Does Tristano love me?

I lean into the flowers and take several deep breaths. Then I pick up my phone and call him. It goes to voice mail.

I leave a message, stating, "Hey. It's me. I just got the gorgeous flowers you sent. Thanks. Ummm... I'll see you tonight. Bye."

I hang up just as Dante knocks on my door. He booms, "Damn, Pina. Someone rob a florist?"

Heat flushes my cheeks. I reply, "Ha ha."

He steps closer. "Who's the lucky guy?"

My pulse picks up. "No one you know," I lie.

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