Page 18 of Purity

“No, don’t do that. I highly doubt I’m going to buy this one, but I still want your opinion on it.”

I have to do this. If I can’t even show my body off in a dress, how can I ever expect to get naked in front of him? I straighten my spine and open the curtain.

Cole and Mari stand only a few feet away, and both of their heads perk up. I make my way out of the dressing room toward Mari. I can’t look at Cole’s face. Not yet.

“Oh my God!” Mari’s lips part into an open-mouthed grin. “This is it. This is the dress. You look like a goddess. I’m not kidding.”

When I start to complain, she halts me with her hand. “Don’t! Just listen to me first.”

I close my mouth and exhale heavily through my nose.

She looks at me probingly. “Your boobs look amazing. You understand that, right? Even if you don’t feel like it?”

“Sort of.”

“No, not sort of. You know. In your heart of hearts, you know your boobs look amazing. Just imagine if they were someone else’s boobs. Would you think they looked good?”

“I don’t know…”

“Think of Brenna. She has boobs like yours. Do you think they look good on her?”

My brow knits as Mariana’s short and curvy friend flashes in my mind. I guess she does have a similar body type, and she often wears shirts that show her cleavage. “Yeah, she does have really nice boobs.”

“See! You do understand.” She places her soft hands on my cheeks and forces me to look up at her. “You not wanting to show off your boobs is not you. It’s a youth pastor telling you your T-shirts are too tight and causing the boys to stumble in their faith. Your body remembers being told those things, even if you don’t agree with them now.”

She’s right. She’s absolutely right.

“Cole, can I get your help?” Mari places both hands on my shoulders and twists me around. “Tell her how good her boobs look.”

It takes me a moment before I can look up at his face, but when I do, a pleasant tingle runs over my skin. His lips are slightly parted, and his wide eyes are fixed on my chest. He’s never looked at me like that before.

Strangely, I don’t want to cover my chest like I thought I would. The look in his eyes makes me feel almost…

Powerful.

“Cole,” Mari’s voice is almost a shout this time, and he snaps his gaze up to her face.

“Yeah…” He lifts his hand and scratches the back of his head. “She looks beautiful. She always looks beautiful.”

“No.” Mari shakes her head sharply. “Don’t minimize it. You know this dress is on a whole other level, and I asked you specifically about her boobs. She’s self-conscious about them. We were raised to think that our bodies are sinful. Livvy especially got hit hard with it, because she developed when we were really young. Tell her how luscious and gorgeous they are. How you want to squeeze them.”

I snort out a laugh. “Mari, stop.”

She looks at me sternly. “When you wear this out tonight, people are going to be staring at your boobs. They won’t be able to help it. How are you going to handle it if you’re too embarrassed to let Cole look at them?”

“I just don’t want him to feel forced to say—”

“I don’t feel forced, Livvy.” When I glance at Cole, his eyes are almost dazed. They drop to my chest, and that achy heat fills my belly once again. “You look…gorgeous. Fucking goddamn…” He shakes his head.

I can’t stop the grin from spreading across my face, even though it probably makes me look girlish. “Well, in that case, I’ll get the dress.” I turn to Mari, frowning. “But what am I going to do about my boobs? They move around too much. How can I stop them from falling out?”

“I’ve got you covered. We’ll tape them.”

I wince. “It always looks so painful when you tape yours.”

“It’s not at all. Trust me. And you’ll feel supported. We’ll push them up like this—” she cups my boobs and smashes them together, “—to give you the best cleavage. What do you think, Cole?”

A little laugh is pulled from my chest, and when I glance at Cole, his eyes are molten again.

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