Page 9 of Ruthless Rose

Chapter 7

Back at home, I slide into one of the rickety seats at our kitchen table and pull out my physics textbook and notes so I can get some of my homework done before dinner. I stare blankly at the lined notebook paper while thinking back over the day. What the heck just happened? The request to help with Micah’s tutoring had come out of nowhere. And, man, he really doesn’t want me to help him. But now I need him to let me follow through with it—not just for his sake, but for mine as well. I shudder. I can’t see this going well, but I’ll have to talk to him tomorrow about setting up a schedule. I can only hope he doesn’t completely bite my head off.

Mom pulls out a chair and sits across from me. “You seem distracted.”

“Mm-hmm.” I keep my eyes glued to my textbook.

She shifts in her chair, resting her elbows on the table. “What’s wrong?”

I huff out a breath. “Everything.” My eyes flick up to hers. “I’ve screwed up and now all my hard work is going to be for nothing.”

“The headmaster called this morning after he spoke to you. He mentioned that he and the guidance counselor had noticed that your applications will get a boost with the addition of tutoring another student and some other extracurricular stuff. Is that what you’re talking about?”

My throat thick with emotion, I nod, unable to speak.

“Honey, it doesn’t mean that you’re not going to get in somewhere. You’re still a great candidate.”

I sniff as a tear sneaks out of the corner of my eye. “I just feel really dumb right now.”

“You’re anything but dumb. We all know that. Wouldn’t you rather they said something than not?”

“Yes. But—”

“So, do the tutoring, be the spirit girl, join the homecoming committee. It’ll be fine.”

“But—” I release a shaky breath. “I think tutoring Micah is going to be difficult.”

“Oh. Is this Micah Robertson?”

“Yep.” I blow a stray strand of hair out of my face.

“Why would it be difficult?” She narrows her eyes.

I shrug. “He seemed pretty ticked off. He’s being forced into it by his football coach.”

“What’s this?” Dad walks into the room, and his reassuring hand grips my shoulder.

Their eyes connect over my head. “She’s worried about all the college application stuff that the headmaster talked to me about this morning.”

Ugh. Talking to Dad about tutoring Micah is about the last thing on earth I want to do. My dad’s really funny about me doing anything with boys. It goes way back to the day eleven-year-old me came home crying and wouldn’t tell him why beyond the fact that I’d run into some mean boys. Ever since, Dad has been overprotective about me going out on my own. He’s worried when I go places with Max, even though I’ve told him a bunch of times thatMax is my friend who also happens to be gay and would never, ever hurt me. Here we are, more than a year into our friendship, and Max and I still get a battery of questions thrown our way from my dad every time Max picks me up to go somewhere.

Dad squeezes my shoulder, then releases me. He sits down at the head of the table. “We’re all for you tutoring if it will help you on your applications.” He shakes his head, folding his hands in front of him. With a quick glance at Mom, he clears his throat. “You know we can’t afford to send you to any of the colleges that are in your top five—not unless you get some sort of scholarship.”

I swallow hard and nod as tears prick the backs of my eyes again. “I know.”

“Hey, look at me. I’m really sorry it makes it a little harder on you knowing that, but I’m sure you’ve overheard… we’re having some financial issues right now.” Mom and Dad own a small bookstore in town. It’s where my love of all things books and learning has come from.

“I’ve heard you arguing.” I look down at the table, unable to hold his gaze.

Mom sighs. “We’re fine, we’re just under a lot of stress. And with something as big as college on the horizon for you, it’s better that you understand what’s happening. We’re in danger of having to close the store.”

My head whips up. “What? No. That can’t—”

Dad holds his hand palm out. “We’re not going to lose it. We just have to be very careful with expenses right now.”

I hear them loud and clear. It’s stressful enough to have business worries, which are causing relationship difficulties, without adding my looming college expense to the mix.

All that said, I’ve always been super diligent with my studies. They’ve never had to push me at all. So, I’ll figure out how I’m going to get this accomplished. It’s under my control whether or not I continue on to the college of my choosing. I’ve mapped it all out and gotten this far. I’m the only person I can count on to make it happen. And damn, it weighs on me, especially now that I know I’ve made a bad judgment call by not being a freaking joiner all these years. It’s all caught up with me, so now I have to participate in these groups and convince Micah to play nice. So, great. Now I’m stuck doing things I don’t want to do and spending time with one big, intimidating jock who doesn’t even remember me.

At least I managed to get away without discussing Micah with Dad—because I don’t think he’d have been as quick to approve if he knew who I’ll be tutoring.

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