Page 36 of My Forever Soldier

“I’ve been offered a position at base, but I’m still deciding.”

“You would volunteer to go back there?”

Sam seemed unbelieving, and Luke didn’t blame him He was referring to Iraq, of course. He’d done his time, come home injured, but Luke? Well, he had something to prove, always had. Standing down wasn’t something that was easy for him, even when the stakes were high.

“Let’s just say I don’t like leaving my boys over there without me.”

He didn’t tell him that Sam had been Delta Force these past two years. That if he’d run into him during that time he wouldn’t have recognized him, would have walked right past him.

“Sir, I’d love you to meet my family. My fiancée and baby girl, they’re just back there.”

He pointed and Luke looked in that direction. The last thing he wanted was to make small talk when he needed to clear his head, but the boy was pretty enthusiastic.

“What do you say we take a rain check on that?” suggested Luke, smiling as he said it so as not to disappoint him. “I’ve really got to be somewhere.”

He watched Sam’s face fall.

“Give me your phone number and I’ll come see you when I’ve got my boy with me. How old is your little girl?”

The young man’s face lit up again. “She’s two, almost two,” he said. “Sir, I didn’t know you had a family!”

Luke nodded. He’d always been reluctant to talk about his home life, so clammed up when conversation came to him personally. Yet here was this boy, so proud of his only child that it made Luke feel like an idiot. Or even more of an idiot than he had before.

“Charlie’s four,” Luke told him. “Great kid.”

Sam beamed. “Yeah, makes coming home worth it, huh?”

Luke needed to go. Right now. It was as if just talking to this young man, barely twenty-one, had made him realize what a fool he’d been. That walking out on Olivia and leaving his boy wondering where he was had been stupid. Ludicrous. Luke couldn’t blame this on his lack of upbringing; his behavior had been inexcusable. And he couldn’t even think about taking the promotion without carefully thinking through the consequences, no matter how badly he wanted it.

“Hey, I gotta go. I’ll find you through the database.”

“But…”

He ignored him and started jogging, his feet thumping rhythmically on the pavement. Luke threw a hand in the air and waved, taking a quick look over his shoulder. “I’ll phone you,” he called out. “I promise.”

He settled into a comfortable pace and focused on getting back to Ollie’s place.Theirplace. It was at least a half hour run from where he was, but that was nothing. He was trained to jog for hours, on no food or water, in the desert. This was like a slow warm-up round.

His leg and side twinged a little, but he ignored it. It might have been enough of an injury to allow him to come home, but it wasn’t enough to stop him fighting for his family.

Charlie was his son, and Olivia was the woman he wanted, and nothing was going to stand in his way.Nothing.

Twenty-five minutes later Luke stuffed his hands into his pockets and slowed to a walk. He hadn’t found the run that bad, but didn’t want to turn up puffing and sweaty, so decided to walk the last few blocks.

Part of him felt like an idiot—like an overreacting moron—but another part felt justified. That he’d had every right to fly off the handle and walk out. Although that part of him was dwindling. Fast. The more he thought about it, the more conflicted he was. The bravado of earlier had left him, to be replaced with a dull thud of worry that perhaps he might not be good enough. That he’d left it too long to say he was sorry.

The house stood before him. It was just a plain, modest bungalow, but it looked loved. Charlie’s bike was out on the front lawn, dropped as if he’d been riding it, then found something better to do. A much-loved toy sat on the doorstep, from the looks of it a rabbit with long, floppy ears. It was like a snapshot of domesticity, and Luke felt a longing to be a part of it. A desire that had been dormant within him for so many years that he’d become afraid of claiming it.

He stood at the bottom of the steps and caught his breath. He was no longer panting from the run, but from the thought of what he had to say. How he would confront Olivia. He took one final lungful of air and moved to the door.

The house was quiet. No sounds emerged from within, though it seemed a little early for Charlie to be in bed, even if he was exhausted from the party. Luke tried the front door, but it was locked. He knocked, waited a few minutes, then knocked again. Perhaps they were out in back and couldn’t hear him? It seemed unlikely.

He moved around the side of the house, navigating the trash can and an assortment of Charlie’s outdoor toys, and peered in the window. Nobody there. He hoped they weren’t out with Ricardo. Had Luke been so unreasonable that he’d pushed her away and into the arms of another man already? He clenched his teeth, swallowing his anger, the only evidence of it left in his hands, clenched into fists at his sides.

Maybe he’d come back in the morning. He had his wallet and the clothes on his back, and he could always wait until tomorrow to beg Olivia’s forgiveness.

But his feet kept walking. Something niggled at him. A touch of worry played through his body, and he had a feeling that something wasn’t quite right.

The back door came into view and he walked toward it. Through the pane of glass he saw Olivia.She was there.As if knowing he was near she looked up, and his stomach turned in a flip. The whites of her eyes and pained expression on her face told him something was wrong. That something wasverywrong.

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