Page 104 of Because of Logan

River snorts. She actually snorts at me.

“Skye would never cheat on you. And Bruno was never her fuck buddy. I just liked to say that to get under her skin.”

“Well, you must be psychic then, because that’s exactly what he is.”

“You’re drunk.”

“Yes, I am. But that does not change the fact I caught them in bed this morning.”

She blanches.

“What?”

All the anger evaporates, and what is left is an emptiness so vast it feels as if I’m free falling into an abyss. Didn’t she see him nearly naked? Maybe she came after he was dressed.

“I saw them, River.”

My voice is shaky, my eyes burn, and there’s a boulder in my throat.

“I saw them,” I whisper as if the hushed words could somehow diminish the pain of saying them.

She’s shaking her head as if denying it would make it less true.

“I don’t know what you saw, but what I do know is Skye loves you. She’s crazy in love with you, and she would never, could never do that. She doesn’t have it in her to cheat on someone. She never even cheated on board games or a test in school.”

“He was in her bed, and all he had on was his boxers.” Saying this, having the images come back to my mind, pushes the boulder in my throat down into my chest and it weighs a thousand pounds. My heart squeezes under its pressure.

“It’s not possible.”

“Did she send you here? To try to convince me to forgive her and take her back?”

“No, she didn’t. She doesn’t know I’m here. She cried until she passed out from exhaustion.”

I flinch at her words. Why is it that knowing that Skye is suffering hurts me more than my own pain?Because you love her, you idiot.

“Talk to your sister. I’m not the one in the wrong here. I know what I saw. And he didn’t deny it.”

I walk back to the door and open it wide, a clear sign that this conversation is over.

River’s shoulders drop, and she shuffles to the door and steps out. She turns and pleads.

“Just hear her out.”

“I don’t think I can.”

I close the door and lock it. The symbolism does not escape me.

Chapter Fifty-Five

I wake up with a start.You know that feeling when you wake up and think you’re late for work or school? That’s how I come to, wondering which day and what time it is. But the blissful moment of confusion evaporates with the first memory of what happened. Pain squeezes my chest. Can heartbreak cause a heart attack? I step out of my bed on unstable feet and pull open the curtains.

I don’t know how long I slept, but the sun is low in the sky. Last night’s snow glints in the late afternoon light in big piles on the side of the road. The street is clear and life goes on outside the window.

Did I sleep the entire day?

Did all of it really happen?

My eyes fall to the small trash can in the corner. It’s full to the top with crumpled and balled-up tissues. If pain could be measured on a scale of tissue boxes, how many boxes would I need to measure mine? I grab my phone from the night table and check it. No messages, no missed calls. I didn’t expect to hear from Logan, but Bruno’s silence annoys me. He still has nothing to say. After all the years we’ve been friends and all the secrets I’ve kept for him, all he had to do was say a single word and Logan would believe me, but he didn’t. He refused. And I couldn’t break my promise to him, not even to right a wrong, not even for Logan. My loyalty to both of them wars inside me. I’m angry at Bruno for not coming clean. I’m angry at myself for not speaking up. But above all, I’m angry at Logan for believing what he thinks he saw instead of me.

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