Page 65 of Pain and Possession

As soon as Noè shuts the door behind him Marcus slumps slightly as if he was holding himself together, “I don't even like women.” I chuckle, shooting him a sympathetic smile. The rest of the exam goes easily until the nature of his questions change, that nagging feeling in my stomach grows to the point I'm sure it's pushing my guts around inside of me.

"You are sexually active?"

Most definitely.

I nod, picking at my nails again until Nona's words disrupt the old habit. Not sure why I actually stop, just feels like I should.

"What contraceptives do you use?" I remain silent, just shaking my head when he casts me a loaded look. He takes a deep breath, "You're a grown woman, it's your decision to make but as I'm sure you know if you don't attempt to prevent pregnancy a pregnancy can occur. There's also the risk of STDs."

I know. I'm stupid, that's part of why I'm here. Just to be safe. To know for sure.

"We'll do a urine test, confirm with blood when we check for STDs." He must notice my nerves as he places a hand lightly on my shoulder.

"It'll be alright. Mr. Arcuri gets checked regularly-"

"It's not that." I cut him off, the idea of listening to how often Noè has to get tested makes my heartbeat faster, bile rising in my throat. Marcus just leans away giving me a knowing look. I feel like a scolded child as the older man readies the tubes to draw my blood, "When was your last period? Just a ballpark will do."

"Uhm, they've always been kind of irregular so over a month, maybe a month and a half." He pauses before he turns back to me pulling my arm out so he can wipe it with the cool alcohol prep pad.

"Bloating?"

I nod.

Fuck.

"Unexplained nausea?"

I nod.

Oh fuck.

"Fatigue?" I nod.

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.

"I'll have the labs expedite the results and they'll call you later today. I promise. No need to add more stress. It can be bad for a-“

Baby.

"I'm not pregnant." I say out loud, half to him but mostly to reassure myself. There's no possible way my life could be anymore fucking complicated. My mind races as panic sets in. I can't be a mother. No fucking way.

"Working yourself up won't help either way."

He's right. Take a deep breath Olive. No reason to freak out until you know for sure.

After he finishes up, I step out of the room, feeling a little more comfortable now that I'm back in my own clothes. An annoyingly small cup I'm supposed to pee in tucked safely underneath my arm. Out of view because after everything we’ve been through for some reason the thought of him seeing my pee makes me want to crawl under a rock and die. Noè practically jumps from where he was leaned up against the wall, immediately turning towards Marcus as I head down the hall.

"Where are you going?" He asks, his body rigid.

"Pee, want to help me wipe?" I retort, channeling some of my nervous energy into something else. Anything fucking else. He smirks, "Brat." Pink scrub lady is sat at a computer close by her eyebrows shooting towards her hairline making me want to kick them clear off her pretty face. As soon as I'm done with the high stakes game of target practice I wash my hands, sitting the collection cup in the small, windowed compartment inside the bathroom. Thankful I don't have to walk past Noè with a cup of my pee. He eyes me suspiciously as we head back to his SUV, as if he's waiting for me to tell him something.

How would I even tell him something like that? Will he be angry? No, he said he wanted… God I can't even say it… did he mean it though? Really mean it? Stop it, Olive. Immediately. I am not pregnant. I'm not. I'm literally fucking not.

Chapter fifteen

Say it

Noè

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