Page 52 of Pain and Possession

"No ice?"

I glare at him, "No."

He grips the handle so tight it think it may snap before he turns on the faucet wetting the towel with cold water. "Your fridge is empty too; do you have food here?" Embarrassment floods in making my cheeks turn pink as he approaches with the rag in one hand cupping the back of my head as he gently presses the cold towel to my eye. I try to take the rag, wincing slightly.

Fuck this shit really hurts.

"I can take care of myself." He meets my glare. His tongue darting out slightly wetting his bottom lip, "That's not what I asked you."

"I don't care what you asked me, get out of my apartment."

"Olive, Camilla sent that to fuck with me. To get under your skin-'

"Well, it fucking worked okay! I hated that, I fucking hated seeing her body on your phone. Reading those words hurt me, okay? I shouldn't care at all though that's why you have to go Noè. For good."

He pulls the rag from my eye jerking me off the counter and into his arms, "I love you. I'm not leaving. A smile breaks out over his face making heat pool in my gut, "And you have feelings for me too little doll. Why deny yourself this?"

"Because I hate everything about you." I answer coldly, all too aware of my sex pressed tightly into him as it tightens with need.

"No, you hate that I make you see a side of yourself you hate. Don't project your bullshit on me Olive. I have never once lied to you; all you've done is lie to me. Lie about what you want, how you feel. How you see yourself, how you see me. Fucking hell woman." He pulls back running a hand through his hair, an exasperated look on his face.

"Have you any clue how fucking bad you scared me this morning? You're lucky Charlotte called to give me the ninth degree about letting you walk, or I would've had search parties tearing through the woods!" I yelp as he grips my shoulders shoving me towards the bedroom, my fists clenched tightly.

"I thought you got hurt! You were lost out there, it fucking scared the shit out of me. I panicked, I was panicking. I don’t fucking panic Olive. Why didn't you wake me up? Why didn't you ask? Fucking communicate with me. Talk to me!" He shoves me again making me fall back on my bed, the cheap frame groaning loudly as he straddles me. A picture of him doing the same just an hour ago as he slams his cut fists into Tom's face forces itself into my mind. Adding to the pulsing tension between my legs.

"Noè stop!"

He leans in, his lips inches from mine as he notches a knee between my legs, pressing hard against my sex, "I will never stop. You can't put yourself at risk like that. You're mine Olive, if you leave… you won't fucking like it. I swear I'll lose it Olive and it’ll be your fault. Last night it hurt you seeing me like that?" He growls.

Of course it did.

I nod, his words infecting my resolve.

"Then stop this. How you felt seeing her message, was nothing compared to what I felt seeing him between your legs. Olive, I may be a masochistbut fucking hell, enough of this. You’ve found my limit. No more pretending, just be mine. Please." I don't know if it's the desperate tone in his gravelly voice, or the need in his eyes but God help me I want him. I want to say yes so badly.

"Why is she so important? I've watched you murder people for nothing. What's different about her?" I ask, gripping at his shirt tightly. He sighs pressing his forehead into mine, "Her family has information on mine, information that could ruin everything. Put good men behind bars for the rest of their lives. I have to play nice enough until I can get that collateral out of their hands. The moment I do-“

I gently put my hand over his mouth, "No more words, no more promises or threats. I do feel things for you. Fucking hell, I have from the very start but none of that matters, not right now. Maybe it never will." Pain fills his eyes as he lightly kisses my palm, removing it from his mouth.

"My beautiful, stubborn little doll." His words melt me, just as effectively as his lips do when they meet mine. Our bodies molding together, Noè twists his hands through my messy hair as it's splayed out across the bed. I gasp when he abruptly leans back, "Get dressed, I'm taking you to the family doctor. Before you argue I will take you by force if you make me, but I'm pretty beat."

He climbs off, leaving me there on the bed alone. I shake my head slowly sitting up, my body yearning for him to return. Waiting for the return of those damming eyes on mine. I do although take his advice glaring when he reemerges from my small closet with some of my clothes draped across his toned arm. I walk a little ways away not worried about undressing in front of him, he's seen it. His heated stare feels like a physical thing on my skin as he watches me intently. Watching as I slowly peel myself from my pajamas, dawning the clotheshepicked out for me.

Like his little doll.

I lean into the butterflies that gives me, it's only us here. Why should I keep doing this? What is it all for? Denying him has only gotten people hurt. What is it inside me that won't accept him? Why can't I just fucking fall?

My pulse picks up as we pull into the towering gates of the compound, watching them slide closed behind me doesn't fill me with dread as I thought it would but this time something closer to anticipation.

Noè pulls in beside a familiar looking car, Charlotte. I can't help but smile a little. She seemed so, normal. So undamaged by the world she lives in. I glance down as Noè removes his crudely wrapped hand from its place on my knee, putting the SUV in park.

He must've worked hard to keep her that way. To keep her clean from this filth. The things he had to endure… I wish it didn't make me see him differently… but it does.

The cool air blowing from the air conditioner makes the missing heat from his touch even more noticeable. I wait until he gets out to tug my top down over my stomach, hiding the patch of pudgy skin better. I should've changed when I noticed the one he grabbed but it didn't seem worth it at the time. I felt safe, sated in my own bedroom.

Comfortable with him.

A strange concept considering our history.

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