Page 66 of What the Heart Wants (Desires of the Heart 1)

I see the look of guilt and regret on each of their faces.

“You’re right. We need to work on the new dynamic. We are each used to the four of us against the world. Somewhere along the way, we forgot to let you in on this side of the wall to be one of us not just a side part,” Levi says softly.

“I’m ashamed that I made you feel that way. I hope that we can find a way to work through this and come out stronger on the other side,” Asher states.

“We need to lay everything on the table,” Ethan says.

“How do I know that what you all feel is real? I know what I felt was real, and I had hoped it wasn’t all one sided,” I start, but Levi cuts me off and grabs my face in his hands.

“I love you more than you can possibly know. I was afraid to admit it to myself, or say it to you, because it would hurt more if I lost you, but I realise that it doesn’t matter that I never said it. I felt like a part of me was missing the moment you walked out that door. I am going to spend the rest of my life showing you just how much I love you.”

The kiss he gives me is quick, but full of desperation. He really wants me to believe his words. A tear falls down my cheek when another hand grabs mine and turns me to face Grayson.

“You will never spend another second wondering if I love you. I will show you and tell you as often as I can. I can’t imagine a day without you in it. The last few weeks have been some of the hardest I have ever been through. I don’t want to go through another day without you.”

Ethan turns me to face him after Grayson kisses me just as Levi did. “I don’t have some fancy speech prepared, but it’s simple. I love you. You have my heart,” he says, and kisses me softly on the lips.

Asher smiles when I face him. “Well, I don’t know how I’m going to follow all of that. I have loved for a long time. If you give us another chance, I won’t hesitate to tell you how I feel again,” he says before claiming my lips.

I’m dazed when I look at all of them, but tears are falling down my cheeks. “I love you all, and that’s why what you did hurt so much. It’s something that’s going to take time. I can forgive you eventually, but the trust is broken and that’s going to take time to heal.”

They nod their heads in understanding. For the first time in a long time, I have hope that we can work through this. .

I spend the next couple hours learning everything I can about their past; how they started, when they met Bethany, and when they lost her.

When they talk about her, I can’t help but touch my hand to my chest and close my eyes.

I will love them with everything I am.

I say silently in my head.

I know you will.

Is softly said back, and I can’t help but gasp.

I don’t know if I ever believed in such things, but it’s as if Bethany was giving me her blessing.

A peace settles through me as I feel the connection with the woman who loved these men just as hard as I did.

I have hope that we can work through this.

By the time the men are done telling their stories, I’m half asleep on the couch.

“Let’s get some rest. Can I hold you?” Levi asks.

I nod my head as my eyes close. I feel myself being lifted and settled onto the bed. There is a body behind me and one in front of me as I fall into a peaceful sleep for the first time in weeks.

Levi

I’m afraid to fall asleep. I feel like this is all a dream and Kyla will be gone as soon as I wake up.

I meet Grayson’s eyes over her shoulder, and he seems to be having the same problem as me.

The only thing about this bed is that it isn’t big enough for the five of us, so Ethan and Asher are sleeping in the next room. I wish I could have everyone here, within arms reach.

I know that everything won’t be fixed overnight. There is a lot of hurt and anger to work through. Things like this take time.

We haven’t touched each other since Kyla left, and I know it won’t happen again until she is ready. I will patiently wait for her.

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