Page 10 of Redemption

Chapter 8

Stunnedby Jasmine’s words and departure, I could only sit on the edge of the bed trying to process what just happened. No one could have been more surprised than me by how I’d responded to her. It wasn’t even the oral sex. Her unspoken commands screamed domination, even though I sensed how much she was holding back. She was right. This was vanilla. Oral sex happened between regular couples every day. She was also correct in that I needed to talk to Bryce about what submission meant. And what the hell a safe word was. Although, the connotation behind it seemed pretty self-explanatory.

Never before had I had this urge to be under the power of a woman, but somehow, with her, Jasmine, it felt… right. Exciting, even. I’d basked under her words of praise. It somehow pleased me to please her. I didn’t mean sexual pleasure, although that was a large component. The thought of her instructing me to do something and following her commands actually made me happy. Content. I didn’t have to think about anything. I could give myself over to her and know that everything would be okay. It just clicked.

What did that say about me as a man, though? Did being submissive make me weak? I hadn’t felt weak when I was with Jasmine. Quite the opposite, in fact. I felt powerful. I was the one who gave her the multiple orgasms. My name was the one she’d screamed out when she climaxed. She may have dominated and controlled the situation, but I still had power. Needing to find Bryce, I quickly donned my discarded shirt and headed back out to the public room in search of my friend.

Ten minutes later I had yet to find Bryce. I’d just about given up hope when I stopped dead in my tracks. Not fifty feet away from me stood someone I never expected to see here. I walked over, pointedly ignoring the almost naked redhead with the Kelly green mask on at his side, especially considering she was his fiancée.

“Connor?” Shock was evident in my tone. Of course, Connor would be the rule breaker. The only person in the entire room not wearing a stupid mask.

My boss. My best friend. And I never knew he lived this type of lifestyle. Our stunned expressions must have surely matched.

Connor cleared his throat before answering. “Miles, what are you doing here?”

“Bryce badgered me into coming. In fact, I was just looking for him when I spotted you. Why didn’t you tell me?”

He didn’t need to ask what I meant.

“I’ve known you for years, Miles. I’ve never seen any indication that you were in the lifestyle. You always spoke of your relationship with Lindsay in vanilla terms. A Dom and sub’s relationship dynamic is a personal thing. I wasn’t under the impression that you had an interest so there was no reason to share with you my sexual inclinations.”

I understood what he was saying, but I was still a little hurt that I hadn’t known this about him. It didn’t matter since now I knew. I had a feeling I would never look at Bridget and him the same way again though.

Connor interrupted my thoughts. “Why did Bryce invite you, anyway?”

“He thought I would have ‘fun’.”

“And are you? Having fun, that is?”

Was I having fun? At the moment, no. But not long ago, with Jasmine? While I wouldn’t consider our time together fun, it was an experience I would be more than happy to repeat. Which made me think of something.

“Do you know Mistress Jasmine?”

A wary expression crossed his face. “What do you know about Mistress Jasmine?”

“I met her this evening.” I hesitated because I was reluctant to share my experience with her with anyone. I suddenly understood why Connor hadn’t shared details of his relationship with Bridget. However, my need to see Jasmine again overrode my reluctance to talk about what had transpired between us. I knew the only way I’d see her again was if I did as she suggested and asked my friend about domination. She’d meant Bryce, but now that I knew Connor was a part of this, I needed the information to come from him. How I knew this, I wasn’t sure. But something told me Connor was the one who needed to explain it to me.

“What can you tell me about Domination and submission? About power exchange?”

He turned to his fiancée, Bridget, and spoke too softly in her ear for me to hear. I read the “Yes, Sir” on her lips before she bussed his lips and left us alone. I realized then that at no time during our conversation had she looked either of us directly in the eye. Her submissive behavior was blatantly evident.

“Follow me.” Connor directed us to the bar on the far right side of the room. He picked two seats at the farthest end.

“Have a seat,” he directed. “Now, why are you asking me about D/s? And most especially about Jasmine?”

I shifted uncomfortably on the bar stool, hesitant about sharing with Connor what had happened between Jasmine and me. Thankfully, he waited patiently until I was ready.

“She took me to a private room.”

Connor cursed under his breath, and I noticed him clenching and unclenching his fists. Why did what happened between Jasmine and me seem to bother him so much? He got his anger under control and gave me his full attention. Whatever had bothered him was gone, and a blank expression now graced his face.

“I don’t want explicit details, but in a vague way, can you tell me what happened? I know Jasmine, so my next question is, did you enjoy the experience? And I don’t mean the sexual aspect of it. I mean the emotional aspect. The power exchange.”

I gathered my thoughts, focusing on everything he was asking me. Even though Jasmine had mentioned the term ‘power exchange’, I wasn’t exactly sure what he meant.

“Remember the former president and the intern? That, only in reverse. Honestly, I felt freer than I have since…” I trailed off, my mind instantly, and without conscious thought, taking me back to that day. Damn it. For one night, I thought I would be free of my demons. Apparently, demons don’t take a vacation. Malcolm’s blood-covered face flashed in my head, his eyes staring at me in condemnation. My eyes squeezed tightly shut in hopes of blocking out the vision.

Connor’s voice sounded tinny and far away in my ear. “Miles? Miles?”

Pain bit into my arm as I was jerked back to the here and now. My gaze dropped to see Connor’s fingers digging into my bicep. I quickly looked up at him, and he removed his fingers from my arm.

“Sorry, um, just daydreamed for a minute there. Anyway, I enjoyed the encounter. In fact, I’d like a repeat of the experience. However, I was told to learn about submission before I could return. So, here’s me, wanting to learn.”

Connor stared at me for several tense minutes, and I waited for him to ask me what the fuck just happened. I tried to play off my “episode”, but I knew something more than just a daydream had taken place a second ago. I prayed he wouldn’t comment on it. A defeated sigh escaped him, and I knew he would let it go. This time.

“I know it’s Sunday, but come see me at the office tomorrow. I’ll explain whatever it is you need to know and answer any questions you might have. 10:00 am, my office.”

Without even a good-bye, he left me sitting there alone, chaos that I refused to acknowledge still echoing in my mind.

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