Page 87 of The Forbidden Alpha

Maybe, deep inside me, I still hoped that someone would genuinely love me, that someone would appreciate me for who I am. But I guess I wished for too much.

Perhaps no matter how much I train or how much I try to get stronger… in the end, I will always remain the weak she-wolf that was ridiculed by everyone.

I guess I am just not someone worth loving.

‘Oh, Celine…’

I cried hard again. It was as if all the built-up pain I had received for the past months exploded in my chest. Am I really that bad? Why can’t someone love me the way I love them? I am so tired of giving my whole, only to be shattered into pieces.

Chapter Fifty-One

I was not in the mood for the rest of the day, but I needed to go down because I had a job to do. When I reached the kitchen, the eyes of my fellow omegas immediately darted on me.

I heaved a sigh and grabbed my apron so I could start getting the ingredients for our dishes tonight. Damn it. I can’t believe how fast time just passed the whole time I was in my room. I didn’t even finish my practice because I soaked myself crying over that goddamn Alpha.

I gritted my teeth and held onto the knife tightly. I got the board and placed all the vegetables that I needed. I could hear the cutting echoing in the whole room. I don’t know if everyone in there was paying attention or not. I didn’t care anyway. I just continued cutting and cutting until I cubed them all and finished.

My moves were so fast that the other omegas had no choice but to work faster to catch up to me.

“Faster. I need those now,” I said as I pointed out the meat they were still trying to cut. Tsk.

“Hey, chill, no one’s coming," Leila said as she dropped the fruits she was holding on the sink. I sighed and just avoided her gaze.

“I just want this done early,” I said.

“Why? I mean, it’s still early anyway.”

I didn’t answer her. Instead, I went to the one who was handling the meat.

This is exhausting. I could still feel my eyes stinging because of crying. Tsk. I let out a sigh and shook my head to shove it away. For sure, my face was red too. I sighed and just continued what I was doing.

Because I was in such a hurry, we could finish making dinner earlier than expected. I also helped in cleaning the kitchen. Damn it. I just want to finish this day already.

“Hey, Celine, will you serve tonight?” Leila asked to which I immediately shook my head.

She looked at me weirdly. But I ignored her and just exited the kitchen. I just hurriedly ran upstairs to my room, not bothering to talk to the other omegas who were still glancing at me every now and then. My hand was resting on the staircase when I suddenly heard a sound of an opening door and realized it was from Lucas’ room.

I almost jumped on my feet and immediately looked toward Lucas’ room. Our eyes met when he was about to close the door behind him.

I quickly avoided his gaze and frantically ran to my room. I was panting when I closed the door behind me. I bit my lip and closed my eyes tightly. My hand flew to my chest as I felt the violent pounding of my heart. Somehow, the complex emotions I have been trying to suppress since this morning are starting to resurface again.

Damn it

I went to my bed and immediately buried my face in the pillow. Once again, I cried my heart out until I fell asleep. I wasn’t myself after that night. I don’t know, but I suddenly felt out of touch. My body felt heavy, and I didn’t have the willpower to get up. So I just decided to call in sick the whole day because I wouldn’t be able to function well if I forced myself to work.

Besides, I also noticed that some pack members have been eyeing me lately. Perhaps, they’re wondering why a servant like me was acting like a brokenhearted brat. I admit that I wasn’t really in my best attitude these past few days.

So I wouldn’t be surprised if, one day, they just kick my butt out of here. I wouldn’t blame them. I would’ve kicked myself out, too, for being an ungrateful werewolf. I don’t even know why they haven’t kicked me out of this room when this is not a room for servants like me.

Shit. Maybe I’ll get banished the second time around if I continue being like this.

I took a deep breath as I hugged the pillow tighter. I pressed my lips together and just stared at the room's window. I was in that position when I heard a knock.

“Celine, it’s me. I’ll come in.”

I jolted a bit when I heard Leila’s voice. The next thing that I heard was the creaking of the door. I slowly shifted to look in her direction. She’s bringing a tray of food.

I sat up immediately.

---