Page 48 of Down to One

K:(Nod)

DW:Maybe you don’t see this ending coming. Maybe those hours you don’t remember, those details—you assume they will drown you, when they might just rescue you and carry you home. Don’t make assumptions. Our time is almost up so let’s bring it back to a few deep breaths.

Pling. Pling. Plinnng.

DW:Breathe in for four and out for four…And again. As we come out of this, let’s go back to those ‘I have the power’ affirmations. Keep going.

K:I don’t kn—My mind might not be able to come up with good ones.

DW:You don’t have to come up with new ones. Just use the ones you’ve already said. The ones you already know to be true in your heart.

K:I have the power to breathe. I have the power to work. To move out. To move away. I have the power to move away.

DW:Good, listen to the gong. Just listen and breathe.

Blonnnnng. Blonnnng. BlooooHONNNNK!

chapter 20

HOONNNNNK!

The horn startled Katie out of that last session with Dr. Walton and she looked up to find a lifted pickup truck with a trio of twenty-something men waving a final good-bye to Landon who was still surrounded by a fairly large group.

The Maverick fans had come out of the woodwork and the woods themselves it seemed. More people kept trickling over to get photos and autographs and Katie had no idea where they came from given the number of vehicles in the ski resort parking lot. At least they bought her the time to a have a meltdown in private.

While Landon signed hats and posed for photos, Katie cursed him out, cursed herself out, cried about the job she’d surely lost, almost hyperventilated, then talked herself down by remembering that last session with Dr. Walton.

She quit seeing him after that. He’d unwittingly convinced her in that fifty-five minutes to move away and start a new lifeand once she had made up her mind, she couldn’t risk him talking her out of it. But she’d held on to his words and pulled from them often.

What assumptions are you making, Katie? Breathe and think. What assumptions are you making?

She was assuming these fans had taken photos of her. She was assuming she’d be recognizable in said photos.

Breathe…think.

By the time, Landon extracted himself and slid in behind the wheel of the Jeep, Katie had her hair smoothed, her makeup touched up, and her hands folded neatly in her lap. Landon hadn’t quite reached her level of acceptance yet. Especially when he looked down and took note of the crumpled tissues in the cup holders.

"Fuck!" He slapped a palm on the steering wheel as he whipped the Jeep around and headed for the exit twice as fast as they’d ambled in an hour ago. "Baby, I’m so sorry, I was sure we’d be fine way out here. It was the ski lift attendant, it had to be. Fucking prick!"

Katie laid a hand on his arm, trying for once to be the calming force instead of the one who needed calming.

"Landon, stop. It’s fine."

"Are you kidding?"

"No."

Landon’s mouth opened and closed, but nothing came out. He’d clearly been on guard, ready to comfort her and probably defend himself, but he’d missed all the energy and tears and irrational thinking.

"You’re serious? You’re not mad?"

"No. I’m fine, okay?"

Landon re-adjusted the cap on his head. "Let’s just recap the day here, Katie: You blew me on my balcony, wouldn’t leave the apartment without giving me a lecture my old man could take notes from, made it very clear that it’d be my ass if anyone so much as glanced twice in our direction today…and now everything’s justfine?"

Katie blushed. A little at the unnecessary blowjob reference, but mostly at what a bossy nag she must seem like.

"Landon, I’m exhausted from worrying, can we just not worry about this particular thing until we know we need to."

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