“Your parents had separated. I moved back. People were gossiping about it. Your mom and I wanted to know. So did your dad.”
“And you didn’t think about how it would affect me? My brothers? Your other children?”
“Of course, we did,” Steve said. “However, you’re not a child. You’re a grown-ass man. We didn’t think you’d all but cut your mom out of your life.”
“That’s just it, Steve. You didn’t think about anyone but yourself. Neither did my mom. And for the last two years, I’ve had to listen to why I should accept you, simply because we share the same biology. I’m told I need to forgive and forget. That the past lies don’t really matter. But you have no idea what you’ve done to me or how this has affected all aspects of my life, and I’m damn fucking tired of explaining it. You’ve had thirty-seven years to come to terms with being my father. My dad made a conscious decision to raise me, knowing I might not be his kid. That takes a man with honor and a whole lot of love, which Dalton Kirby has in spades. He’s never wavered, either. Not even when you waltzed back into our lives as if you belonged in them. I mean no disrespect, but you are not my dad. You never will be, and just because you and my mother are in a relationship doesn’t mean I’m going to welcome you in any capacity. You’ve fucked with my identity, and now I need time to figure out some things about myself. Maybe that sounds childish or immature, but that’s my truth. And even when Idoget all that straightened out in my mind, you’ll never be my father. That title is reserved for the man who cared enough to be there when things got tough.” Jamison tried to swallow but he couldn’t. The harshness of his words was too much. He’d gone too far, and he knew it.
“You know what, fuck it,” Steve said under his breath. “You talk about what all this did to you and how damn tired you are and that I’m some selfish monster, but you missed out on some key information. Do you even know why I left town?”
“Yeah. To build your empire and because you and my mom—”
“No. I left because my mother was dying, and I needed to go back to Miami to take care of her. I have money and means, and I wasn’t about to have other people taking care of her in her final days. I wanted to do that, especially if there was a chance she could live longer. I wanted to make sure she had the best treatment money could buy.” He stood and found the bottle of tequila, refilling his glass and downing half of it. “I promised Rebecca that I wouldn’t tell you this shit because she didn’t want you to feel like I was justifying or putting my family’s needs over you or some bullshit. She thought that would fuck with your fragile psyche more. Well, fuck that. You’re not fragile whatsoever, and you’re a grown-ass man.”
“That’s correct,” Jamison said.
“My mother hung on for five years. She lived to see me get married and was there when Tallahassee was born. My biggest regret with my mom was that she didn’t know about you,” Steve said. “The cold, hard facts are that as parents, we make some pretty questionable decisions. Plain and simple, we fucked up.” He swiped the tears that rolled down his cheeks.
“I can agree with you on that point.”
Steve laughed. “When I told Rebecca I was leaving for Miami, I asked her to come with me, but we know that wasn’t possible. I wouldn’t stay because of my mom, but I told Rebecca that I’d try and talk my mom into moving and that I’d help her raise you. But once she decided to stay with Dalton, I felt I had no choice, and my mom became my priority. I loved you. I wanted you, but I no longer had a say in the matter.”
Jamison leaned against the doorjamb. “You always have a choice. However, I can respect wanting to take care of your mom. What I don’t understand is why you didn’t do the DNA test sooner?”
“That was my fault,” Steve said. “Once your parents decided to stay together, I told your mom that was it. That things needed to stay that way for your sake and for my mom and me. I didn’t want her to be on her death bed thinking I had a child she couldn’t get to know. That would have been heart breaking for her, and I was afraid I’d do something crazy like try to get visitation or something, and that would have been a shitshow not just for you, but for your brothers, as well.”
Jamison had to admit that all made sense. “What about when you returned? You had an entire year before you told me.”
“Your parents and I fought about that. But even I thought I’d be okay. What difference did it make if you knew or not? I was in town for six months before I broke down and told Rebecca that I had to know for sure.”
“Were you and my mom a thing yet?”
“It was on and off. Mostly off because there was a hole in my heart because of you.”
“All very selfish, if you ask me.”
“I won’t deny that,” Steve said. “Look. If I weren’t your biological father, would you be having such a hard time with your mom and me being in a relationship?”
“Honestly, I don’t know,” Jamison said quickly. “You had an affair. You and my mom both betrayed my dad and me and my brothers. And, as a husband, I know what that feels like. It sucks. I have some serious issues when it comes to honesty and loyalty. I don’t know if you have any idea what that’s like, but you end up questioning everything that people say and do. It’s an exhausting way to live, and I don’t want people in my life that I have to worry about, wondering if they are being truthful.”
“I’ve only lied to you about one thing.”
Jamison ran a hand across the top of his head. “And that’s supposed to make everything okay?”
“No,” Steve said. “I’m going to ask your mom to marry me. I’m not going anywhere. All I’m asking for is the opportunity to get to know you as a person. Not as a father. You have one, and to be totally honest, I knew I was leaving you in the best of hands.”
“I guess that’s something,” Jamison said.
Steve glanced over his shoulder. “Oh shit,” he mumbled. “Your ex-wife just arrived.”
Jamison leaned forward and glanced toward the pool area. “Why can’t my mother get that I want nothing to do with Cheryl?”
“That is something I don’t have an answer for. I’ve told her I don’t think you’re compatible.”
Jamison burst out laughing. “I’m not sure if I find this funny because you’re right or that my mom isn’t listening to you.”
“She won’t listen to your dad, either. He told her flat out this morning when we were setting up that she shouldn’t be inviting Cheryl to things. I think Dalton called her a manipulative bitch.”
Jamison had to appreciate the way Steve used the wordDadto describe his father. It meant something. “Sounds like my dad.”