Page 51 of Charming Cruel Boys

What the hell is this? I stare at him as I wait for the joke, the cruel words. When none come, I shake my head. “No. Aside from our study sessions, you’ve never been nice to me. Why would you help me run away?”

The corner of his mouth ticks up in a sad smile. “I’m sorry for being such a dick to you, Remi. I’m good at hurting you. I can use my words like weapons and cut you down as easily as I breathe. And it’s alright because I can justify it. Everything is so much bigger than you and me. But being in this fucking house and watching the way Charles treats you, it’s wearing on me. So you don’t have to believe me if you don’t want to, but I really am only trying to help.”

I blink, my lips parting but no sound coming out. After a long pause, I narrow my eyes suspiciously. “Okay, I don’t have the energy to comment on any of that right now, but just know that I’ll be looping back to this conversation later.” Then I stand and make my way to the door.

“Where are you going?” Knight rushes out.

“Gotta get some food or I’ll get grumpy, and I’m not in the mood for an all-out war with you tonight,” I answer without turning to face him.I can’t right now. Those navy eyes could drown me if he tried hard enough, and I’m not strong enough to fight it.

Suddenly, Knight’s at my side, placing a gentle hand on my shoulder and turning me toward him.He’s too close, I scream in my head. “Stay. I’ll get you something,” he says quietly.

I arch a brow. What is he going to do, make me a PB&J with mustard? He’s being way too tolerable. And sweet. Much, much too sweet. I’m suspicious as hell. “I’m alright. I can make something really quick.”

“Remi, please,” Knight sighs, tucking a hand into the pocket of his black jeans. “It’s the least I can do. You have no clue how much you’re helping me with all this. It’s not just you who’s benefitting from these study sessions. I have to keep my grades up too, and calculus is the only class I’m really struggling in, but you’re helping me. So shut up and let me make some food for you.”

I study him for a moment, tracking my eyes over his features. The dark blue eyes, the long lashes that frame them, the light dusting of stubble along that sharp jaw. Can I trust him with something as simple as getting me food? I guess you have to start somewhere. “Okay, thanks.”

Knight leaves after flashing me a soft, surprisingly genuine smile. I turn on the TV to pass the time. When one episode ends and another starts, I frown, checking my phone. Knight’s been gone for a while.

I get out of bed and follow the gentle curses drifting up from the kitchen. Turning the corner into the large, open space, I almost swallow my tongue trying to hold back a laugh.“What are you doing?” I ask as I walk closer.

Knight is standing at the stove, swearing like a sailor under his breath, waving a hand through the air to dissipate a cloud of smoke. He startles at my voice, turning to me with red cheeks and a frown.“I was trying to make spaghetti. But I sliced my finger cutting an onion, and then the water boiled over, and now there’s smoke everywhere.” He cringes. It’s pretty adorable.I like seeing this brooding asshole out of his element.

Closing the distance between us, I turn the burner off, survey the mess he’s made, and then grab the hand that’s dripping blood onto the cream-tiled floor.“You and your mother, I swear,” I mumble with a laugh. “I think I should ban the two of you from the kitchen unless I’m here to supervise.” I smile at Knight, leading him to the sink to rinse off his middle finger. Once I get the cut clean and I can properly see it, I grab a paper towel, intending to wrap his finger with it.

Only, that’s not what I do.

It’s like my brain short-circuits.

Without thinking, I bring Knight’s finger to my mouth and suck the small bead of blood welling there. It’s something I heard once, and it’s probably not even true.Suck on a cut and it’ll stop bleeding. Doesn’t even make sense, but here I am, with Knight’s finger in my goddamn mouth.

He exhales sharply, but he doesn’t pull away. He steps into me, cupping my jaw with his other hand. His pupils dilate as he watches me. He moves the hand on my jaw down to my throat, gently circling and squeezing, drawing a low whimper from my lips.

I pull his finger from my mouth, flicking my eyes to the wound, happy to see that it’s not bleeding anymore. “Better,” I breathe.

Knight swallows roughly, his fingers flexing around my throat, both of us breathing deeply. “You disarm me, Remi. You ruin me, break me, weaken me. I thought I had it all figured out until you barreled your way into my life,”he whispers.

“I’m sorry,” I tell him, though what I’m sorry for, I’m not sure. Certainly not for whatever got us to this very moment.

“No, I’m sorry,” he says, his voice thick with genuine meaning.

I lick my lips and Knight watches the movement with heavy-lidded eyes. With a low groan, he leans in, stopping just before our mouths meet. Closing his eyes, he sighs, shaking his head. “I can’t,” he rasps. With a final longing look, he releases me and stalks out of the kitchen.

I ball my fists together at my sides, digging my fingernails into my palms. I keep putting myself in this situation. Being around Knight is too much, too hard, too consuming. No matter how many times he does this, I still hold out hope that maybe next time he’ll surprise me. Maybe next time, he’ll kiss away my pain and apologize for everything he’s done. But just as we start to get somewhere, he backpedals. Does he seriously not want me like that? Am I pushing it on him without realizing? I cruse myself for getting into this situation, and then I push it to the back of my mind. It would take a century to figure Knight out, and I’m famished.

I make myself a sandwich, practically inhale the entire thing, and then survey the mess around me. As I’m cleaning up the kitchen, Rose walks in with a soft smile, her blonde hair piled up in a ponytail. “Hi, sweetheart,” she coos as she rounds the island and starts cleaning beside me.

“Hey, Rose,” I answer kindly, even though her son just royally screwed me. And not in a fun way.

“What happened in here?”she asks, tucking some loose hair behind her ear and chewing on her lip. Poor thing probably thinks my father and I had another show down and trashed the kitchen. Yesterday was the first time I’ve seen her stand up to him and she seems pretty shaken.

“Knight was trying to cook,”I mumble.

Rose stops wiping down the counter, turning to face me with both brows raised. “My son Knight? I’ve never seen him cook a day in his life.”

I shrug and drop my eyes while I think that over. “We were working on math homework and I got hungry. I was going to make some food, but he insisted. I should have at least followed him down here to preventthis.“ I gesture around at the mess everywhere.

Rose blinks and then smiles, her entire face lighting up. “You know, Jerry, the boys’ father, he used to do things like that. He could have been awful at something, but he’d do it anyway, for me. Especially when I was pregnant. Pregnancy is hard, but carrying twins?One day, I told Jerry that I didn’t like the blue we painted the nursery. I said that I’d have a friend pick me up over the weekend and take me to get another color and that I’d paint the room again on my own as I had the energy. I was only five months along, but I was so tired and big already, I felt useless. I just wanted to do one thing on my own so my husband didn’t have to.” She wipes away a stray tear, rubbing a palm against her flat stomach as if reminiscing.

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