Page 22 of Charming Cruel Boys

I can see well enough with the moonlight pooling in through the window, and I bet it looks much worse in the light. Knight is beat to shit. His face is mottled with purple and blue splotches and his right eye is slightly swollen. There’s a cut on his lower lip that’s dribbled blood down the front of his dark gray shirt.He was pacing the room when I came in, but now he’s standing in the center of it, glaring at me like the condition of his face is somehow my fault.

I should walk away. Right now.

But my feet don’t listen. Instead, I step farther into the room, closing the distance between us. “What happened?” I ask softly as I start to reach for his face. I stop halfway, thinking better of it, and my hand floats in the air awkwardly before I drop it to my side.I came in here to get Knight’s side of the story, and maybe berate him for what he did, but all the fight left my body the second I saw his broken face.

“Duke,” Knight says, his voice rough and tight. His breath fans my face, and I’m hit with the harsh smell of alcohol.

“Duke? I— Oh,” I say as realization slams into me. Duke did this to his brother because of what Knight did a year ago. Knight is an ass, there’s no denying that, but I suddenly feel guilty.I don’t want to be the reason they fight. Twins are supposed to be close. If I wasn’t involved, they might get along a lot better.

“Why’d you do it, Knight?” I don’t need to elaborate. His blue eyes flash with something close to sorrow and he licks his split lip as he thinks.

Shaking his head, he slurs a little as he says, “It doesn’t matter now. You’re back with him, right? It was all for nothing.” Even though we’re standing perfectly still, Knight manages to stumble forward a bit, and instinctively, my hands shoot up to stop his fall.He sucks in a breath as our skin connects and I hesitate before letting him go.

“Here, sit down,” I mumble, leading a very intoxicated Knight over to the edge of his black bed. He plops down and drops his head, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees.

A week ago, if you would have told me that Knight Ashbury could look so wounded and small, I’d have asked what kind of crack you were smoking. But now, as I watch him heave in heavy breaths and fist his long blonde hair, it’s like I’m seeing him for the first time. Seeing beneath the armor and mask and false bravado.Like recognizes like, right? Well, my broken soul recognizes his in this moment, and despite my best efforts, my heart softens toward him.

I don’t owe him anything, especially after the way he’s treated me, but the thought of walking out that door and leaving him alone in this state doesn’t sit well with me. So I settle in next to him and watch quietly as he tries to calm whatever thoughts are plaguing his mind.After a few tense moments, I sigh. “I don’t know why it matters to you, but I’m not back with Duke. That’s not how it works. It’s been a year. He can’t just stroll back into my life when he decides he wants to.”

Knight finally looks at me, his brows drawn together as his lips part. I don’t know how much of that is due to all the alcohol strumming through his veins or if what I said is really just a strange concept to him.He swallows and drops my gaze. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry, Remi. For breaking you guys up, for the way I speak to you every goddamn day. I’m just so fucking angry athimand you’re here, and I don’t know what you know. You could be innocent or you could be my enemy, and I don’t know what to do with that… Now it’s all gone to shit anyway,“ he says harshly, although the slur takes the edge off.

“What do you mean?”Drunk ramblings from Knight make zero sense. I tell myself this conversation is pointless when he’s so wasted, but my ass stays rooted to his bed and my heart beats an unsteady rhythm.

He takes a shuddering breath and stares at me with a pale face. “If your family was in danger, you’d do anything to protect them, right?”

“Um, well...” I trail off because I don’t know what to say. “My only family is my dad. I don’t know if you know this, but my mom died giving birth to me. Both my parents were only children so I don’t have any aunts, uncles, or cousins. And my dad… uh, I don’t think he’d take to me trying to protect him very well, even if I felt inclined to try. And even if he was in some kind of trouble, I doubt he’d tell me, so that’s not really a scenario I’ve ever had to think about.” Knight nods, chewing on his lip as his eyes glaze over. “Why do you ask?” I get the sense that was a loaded question and the look on his face unsettles me something fierce.

“It doesn’t matter,” he says too quickly.

“It matters to me,” I offer, grabbing his attention once more.

“Why?”He shoots me a skeptical look, balling his hands in his lap.

I shrug. “Because I can see that you’re hurting, Knight. And when people hurt, they lash out. I think you’ve been struggling for a long time and nobody else has stopped to notice. You’ve said some really horrible things to me, but they’re just empty words from a guy too used to pushing people away. So, how about we call a truce and you tell me what’s bothering you?”I say softly, trying on a hesitant smile.

“I don’t believe my dad’s death was an accident,” Knight blurts out. “He was killed because I put him in danger. Because I told him something the night before, and I think he took it upon himself to do something about it. And I’m worried the same might happen to Duke or even my mom if I’m not careful.” He speaks the words so quickly like he’s worried that I’ll leave before he gets it all out. But how can I? I’m cemented to the spot, a mixture of shock, horror, and empathy shooting through me. I can see it in his features, the guilt that he’s been carrying over all of this is eating at him.

“Knight,” I breathe. “You can’t blame yourself. Whatever happened, if your dad was trying to make something right for you, it’s not your fault. I’m so sorry that he died, but I don’t believe he would regret anything if he was doing it for you. And this isn’t something you should carry on your own. Duke isn’t helpless. Obviously. He beat the shit out of you today. I think he can hold his own.”

Knight snorts at that. He exhales, pulling out a cigarette and flicking it between his fingers. “It’s not something I can ever tell him, though. So how do I keep him safeandkeep him in the dark?”

“Why can’t you tell him?” I ask, fully immersed in this wild story now. What happened to their dad? What is Knight so afraid of? Why is he a dick to me when I have nothing to do with any of it?

Knight tenses his jaw and his face hardens, suddenly looking more like the villain I’ve made him out to be in my head. “Don’t try to trick me into spilling my secrets, Remi. For all I know, you’re part of the whole fucking thing and I’ll get a knife in my back the second I turn around.”

I blink several times, trying to keep my cool because he’s belligerent and I don’t want to pick a fight. But goddamn, do I wish I could punch this motherfucker sometimes. “I have no clue what you’re talking about. Don’t accuse me of anything, Knight. I have every right to freak out on you over what I found out today, but instead, I’m sitting here being kind and listening to you, wanting to help you.”

“Why?! That’s what doesn’t make sense to me, Remi. After the way I’ve treated you, how do I know you’re not plotting something and being nice is just a distraction.”

I stand up and fling my arms out, fed up with this bullshit. “Oh my god, do you hear yourself? Not everybody has an ulterior motive. You know why I’m being nice? Because that’s who I am! Because despite you being a fucking bully ninety percent of the time, I’d like to believe you’re a good person underneath it all.”

Knight scoffs and shakes his head at me like I’m some stupid little girl. “You’re clueless. Get out,” he orders.

I widen my eyes, my mouth opening and closing, searching for the right words. Finally, I just utter, “What?”

“Get. Out.” Knight stands and stalks across the room, opening the door for me.

“Did I say something? Get too close to that black heart of yours?”

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